Waiting (a pernico fic)

Chapter 6

Okay, so this chapter might me triggering, so read with your own discretion.

Nico's POV

Back in his cabin, Nico rooted through his clothes and pulled on a long-sleeved shirt, feeling like shit. Percy was hanging with their friends and Nico "had a migraine". Really, Nico just wanted some time to himself. Yes, he loved Percy and all that, but he needed time to be alone.
He'd been sitting in his bathroom, staring at his legs and arms, both were covered in thick scars, and Nico couldn't help feeling like a freak. Who around here dealt with their feelings by hurting theirselves? No one.
All at once, Nico had grabbed his razor, not knowing what to do with his pent up self loathing, and running the cold steel along his skin, hissing as the familiar pain washed over him, then the relief made him sigh. Then and there, he knew that if Percy ever found out that Nico was such a freak, he'd leave him, so he resolved that if Percy brought up earlier, he'd say that that was when his migraine had started.
Once he was covered in a black long sleeved crew neck and pj pants, he relaxed into his bed, the oblivion that rushed through his veins helping to try to fall asleep. Before he blacked out, he wondered if he would have nightmares...

Percy's POV

Percy made his way back to Nico's cabin, slight worry curling in the pit of his stomach. The boy had said he'd come to dinner if he felt up to it, but Percy hadn't seen the boy for the rest of the day. Remembering how Nico used to hide away in his cabin for days at a time, Percy didn't want him to fall back into that habit.
Knocking thrice, Percy opened the door and called "Its Percy, Nico. You feeling better?" No answer. The knot in his stomach tightened and Percy barged in and looked around for his boyfriend.
He spotted him on his bed, deathly pale and breathing shallowly. "Shishitshitshitshit, Nico, can you hear me? Shitshitshitshitshit," Percy scooped the boy up and ran to the infirmary, not bothering to suppress the tears of fear that stained his face.

Will's POV

"Is anyone here?! Please, please help my boyfriend," Will heard Percy yelling as he burst in, Nico unconscious in his arms. "Here!" Will yelled, and Nico was set on a exam table, and his shirt was taken off to reveal gashes all over his arms and stomach. Then, Will understood what was wrong. "Nico hurt himself, and he is losing too much blood. We need to stop the bleeding and stitch him up. I need some help!" The next hour was a blur of activity and tears as they worked to save the son of Hades.

Percy's POV

Campers and healers were sprinting about, doing what needed to be done to save Nico, while Nico was perfectly still. It made Percy's heart beat too hard as his vision was blurred by his tears. Why would he hurt himself? Percy was supposed to be making him happy. He'd sworn. But he thought he'd been successful. What changed? Percy held his head in his hands and tried to think. Nico had been so happy all day, then at lunch, he'd been like he used to be. What happened in between then? All they'd done was go to Nico's check up. Wait. Nico had been uncomfortable around Will, maybe Will had done something, said something... Percy looked up when Will came in, blood on his hands and a pensive look on his face. "He's stable. If you hadn't brought him in when you did, he wouldn't have made it. I don't think he'd tried to kill himself, but that he'd hurt himself and cut too deeply. But he's okay, and conscious. He asked me to come get you." Percy was up and past Will before he'd finished the sentence.
Percy rushed into the room and Nico smiled small. "You look like you've seen a ghost." Percy collapsed into a chair next to his bed, half laughing, half crying. "What happened, Neeks? What did Will do?"
"Will? Nothing. I just... I was just upset."
"So you hurt yourself? I don't understand."
"I know you don't. I didn't expect you to. But before you start to blame anyone, it's only my own fault. It was stupid and I shouldn't have." Nico grabbed Percy's hand and squeezed. Percy nodded and it quiet a few minutes. Then Nico laughed bitterly. "What?"
"I was upset because I thought that if you saw my scars, you'd leave me. So I was mad at myself for starting. Then I cut myself because I hated myself. Isn't that ironic?" Percy watched Nico's face. "I wouldn't leave you because of that. I have plenty of scars myself." Nico laughed again. "True, but you didn't cut yourself. So it's different."
"Not to me. Scars are scars, not matter why they're there." Nico was silent, then he started crying and Percy held him close. "I love you, Neeks."
"I love you too, Perce."

AN: I'm so sorry about having Nico hurt himself but it's part of the plot and for the shortness. I'll make up for it next chapter with the fluff requests. See you then loves! 🐙-ps16