I'm A Not Girl//PHAN

Chapter 1:

Edit: Wow i wrote this five months ago back in January so its pretty bad but DW my writing gets less crappy further into the book

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Dans P.O.V

The social worker squints in the sun before opening the car door gesturing for me to get our already annoyed after the long drive consisting if me sobbing and screaming for her to swerve off the road.

"Dani-Uh I mean Dan, please give this place a chance you might actually like it here!" Jenny urges. I snort louder than intended at her remark. As if she even gives a crap again just wanting to get her pay cheque or get rid of the kid thats hindered her for years.

"Fine!" I groan rolling out the car and failing and stretching my legs and arms. Stuff from the rude my knees buckle and I almost fall into the dirt before steadying myself as the perimetre began to blurr.

The bright sun burns my eyes and radiates my pale skin making me want to curl back up inside the car and never leave. I've never bene on good terms with the sun its heats radiating and powerful.

I don't know my parents and I never have. I just go in and out of foster homes. Go to a foster home, get bullied. Go to another, get bullied. I'm used to not getting attached. Its routine...

"It might be better this time, don't worry its a nice little town" Jenny tries to comfort me but fails miserably. I merely shrug and walk up the cobble path. It was a nice town. The type of a dream with cobble pathways and flowers blossoming around you. Vines laced doorways but it looked nice. The town was quite aethsteticly pleasing. What? I'm addicted to tumblr. Don't judge me.

Groaning I pull myself and suitcase along to the front door of the foster home where we are immediantly greeted by a woman with a loose blonde ponytail and a lip ring.

She seemed to be wearing black skinny jeans and a white blouse. "You must be feeling very strange but trust me its a really safe and friendly foster home. With a no bad bahaviour policy"

Bad behavior policy? What are we 5. Doubt it will do anything anyway. They all have behavior policies but they dont know how to use them though

"Well if you count out Phil but he's naturally um...troubled" she says standing up and pointing towards a door I had only just walked through,

"Follow me!"

Confused by the very brief and quick introduction I begin slowly stumbling behind the woman. The hallways painted with a rainbow of colors with some permanently stained by a five year olds crayon scribbles.

My eyes widen as I see the staircase. Of course there would be stairs but these were those spiraled ones where the cut short in the center usually resulting with my downfall.

Reluctant to any excereize I clam our up the stairs each one creaking beneath my feet making my scrunch my face up cringing.

Coughing she points to a black door painted with cherry blossoms with the word Phil scratched into the side of the door.

Huh? Strange?
Sighing I walk into the room after she shoved the door a few times to get it open. Guessing its pretty old this place. Filled with trapped souls justw waiting for a release. Wow Dan how positive.

One side was decorated with band posters and mostly black whereas the other was plain. Probably my side. Unless Phil really enjoyed the color white and the last person here left all their stuff.

"You can decorate your half of the room however you like," the woman said which actually excites me. My own space. My own little box.

"You share with Phil Lester who is 16 like you" she said with a little pity in her voice. Phil? Is that the boy she said was naturally troubled.

Oh wow. I hope not. The woman who I now know is called Melanie told me Phil would be back soon and try to be nice blah blah blah before finally leaving me to unpack.

My wall is pastel mint which is extremely satisfying. Firstly I throw all my clothes and shoes into drawers making sure to leave one drawer for all my private stuff and 'journals'.

Now to tackle my bedding. It was white which I knew I would ruin so I decide to swap it for a checkered black grey and white duvet cover. Now all I need to do is add a few posters and organise some stuff.

Okay I did a lot of stuff but it looks really nice now. My walls have six posters, my drawers are organised and topped with MCR albums and tons of anime.

Traditional nerdy guys room. "FOR GOD SAKE!" A yell startles me as I spin round and stop like a deer in headlights at a tall intimidating boy.

I almost choke as I look at him. He's pale however his dark hair which flops over half his face defines shadows on his jaw and cheeks. If not for the yelling I would have probably druled.

"Wait who are you?!" He demands.

"Um...D...D....Da....Dan" I stutter absolutely terrified of the black haired boy in front of me.

And holy shit if he didnt seem to be a sarcastic ass hole I would swipe right.

Snarling the boy turned away and began to walk over to his bed. Suddenly he starts laughing. Really. Really. Loudly. Before I can process my actions I cough and he looks at me with a big smirk across his face.

"Tell me your name!" He giggles. I literally just told him. But he scares me.
"My name is Dan Howell"
"No, that's not right!"
"Um...my name IS Dan"
"STOP LYING NOW TELL ME YOUR NAME!"
"Dan?"
"Your dead name!"
I freeze in shock. How does he know. Oh god no. If I tell, he will never call me Dan and only.....
"No!"
"I will ask your social worker, she must know the real name of her lesbian mistake!"
"NO PLEASE NO PLEASE I WILL DO ANYTHING!"

Did I really just say that. He sits up filled with anger. He's going to hit me. No not again. My last school buly beat me up everyday until one day I was lyig in a hospital bed!

"Please don't hit me!" I whimper curling into a ball. I have no idea why but I always seem to panic.

His expression seems to soften.  But for only a second. "I'm not going to hit you!" He says,"Have other people hit you?!"

For a second he looked concerned and I nearly opened up.

"ACTUALLY I DONT CARE I HOPE PEOPLE HIT YOU" He yells startling me. He begins to storm out and as he does I feel a harsh kick in my ribs.

I groan loudly before curling into a ball on my bed and crying silently. Why am I so over dramatic.

Hoi there! Sorry if I'm a confusing writer I will work on making more sense

Youtube: Chloeisnotameme

Edit: oh god this is so cringey but idk wether to edit it