Loving Jungkook.

Chapter 21.

-Kim Taehyung-
🗻

{Chapter 21: Sunrise in his eyes.}

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Jungkook was snoring softly with me curled up in his arms, I started to think of all the events of this whole night or last night seeing as its 4am.

I couldn't fall asleep and I didn't know why... Maybe it's because my mind was up and about yelling at me.

My mind was telling me that Jungkook and I were moving to fast, that he didn't like me and having sex was just a perk he so happened to get out of the fake dating.

"Taehyung are you still awake?" I heard Jungkooks voice say in a whisper, I didn't respond instead  closed my eyes tightly praying he didn't notice I was awake. His fingers drew swirls on my back, I didn't know if it was to comfort me or himself.

"Taehyung...You're not awake but I know about the letters. Why didn't you tell me?"

I felt my heart beat a bit faster. That's why I couldn't find the letter in my backpack a couple days ago...

"It was on the floor of my jeep next to your bag... Why didn't you tell me you felt like this for the past two years. It would of cleared up so much stuff." His words came out husky and deep making me take long shakey breaths that I hoped he wouldn't catch.

I have been so stressed with everything, that Taeyong kid telling me stuff about his dad and how he hates him. He explained his dad exactly like the one I once had and it didn't take a rocket scientist to connect the dots. I forgot all about giving the letter so when I lost it I didn't care.

But now I do.

"I was scared." My voice was rough not bothering to move away from where I was snuggled deep into his chest. Not wanting to face him at this moment, because now he knew my dirty little secret.

That I, Kim taehyung have a crush on the younger boy.

That I'm in love with him.

"Scared of what?" He asked in a whisper, I looked up at him. He was staring at the ceiling but his arms were still wrapped around me tightly not letting go.

"Scared of rejection. Everyone knew you told Jimin you didn't like boys and how you rejected him. I didn't want to be another boy added to the list...I figured not telling you who I was and confessing was easier." I replied in a soft whisper the tears creating a river in my eyes, I don't think this is what's  supposed to happen after you share a physical and emotional moment with someone.

I thought you were supposed to be happy not almost in tears.

"But I love you! Did you not notice me stare at you at school? Why did you think I wanted you to tutor me?"

My breath hitches at his words, Jungkook sounded so torn. Leaning up the blanket falling down to my waist revealing my naked upper body. Jungkook leaned up to reach over to turn on the lamp, I finally could see his face. He had a confused glint in his eyes along with his fingers shaking.

"I never noticed. How could I? You were with loads of girls!" My voice raised slightly as I ran my fingers through my hair.

"I was with loads of girls wishing you would get jealous!"

Now his voice was the one raised causing me to let out a huff. We both loved each other but we sat in silence. I felt my heart beating a bit faster, this moment felt like an episode from a stupid K-Drama.

Sad and angry.

"Maybe if you were with loads of guys I would of been jealous but you being with tons of girls just made me think that's cause he's straight."

"So we both stared at each other and fell deeper in love, along with feeling fear...This is so unreal."

"What did you think of the letters?"

"They were romantic, I felt loved..."

"That was the goal" I replied staring at the duvet touching it with my finger tips.  Jungkooks hand grabbed a hold of my own making me look at him.

Our lips met.

He kissed me with do much passion, anger and sadness. We pulled away resting our foreheads against each other just breathing heavily from the passion filled kiss.

"I don't want to be without you anymore..." Jungkook whispered his hand going to tangle his fingers into my hair, instead of responding to him I reconnected our lips.

Because even without an answer he understood that was a yes.

Yes to not letting go.

Yes to being there when he needed me, needed a friend or needed a shoulder to cry on.

I would be there.

And as the dark outside turned to a pretty peach toned color, we laid down in each others arms with our eyes watching the sun rise from the small opening in his curtains.

📃The letter.📃

Dear Jungkook.

How do I say this?

You look so beautiful every day.

So graceful and I'm thankful I'm able to look at you everyday.

I don't understand how your love got me looking so crazy right now.

You got me hoping you'll fall for me just like I fell for you.

It's a beat that my heart skips when I'm near you.

I know girls who love you but I know they don't love you like I do. They wouldn't give up everything to be with you like I would.

But I must face the facts. You won't ever like me like I like you. You will never love me like I love you.

And I think I can learn to be okay with that.

From me to you.

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🏳thank you for reading chapter 21😄

Edited by me🎉💞