Hidden Secrets (Harry Styles)

Chapter 7

It had been a week or so since I hung out with Louis. I wanted to hang out with him again, but I didn't want to seem too eager. I was still unknown in this city and my friend list wasn't as long as I wished it was. He was about it for people I wanted to see right now. 

I decided since I was feeling lonely that I should probably call my mom and dad, I haven't talked to them in such a long time, and I had to admit I'd been missing them. Even if we weren't passionately close, they were still my parents and I was still half way across the world from them. 

I walked through my finished apartment to my bag in the kitchen. It was just past noon and I was still in my pyjamas, my hair up in a messy bun and no makeup. I hadn't bothered getting dressed because the only thing I had going was work at 8 tonight. Most of my days in London so far have been spent watching Netflix for 10 hours straight and then working 10 hours straight. I really needed to go out and meet some more friends, however I was fine with just Louis, and seeing Jamie, and Becca at work.

I fished my iPhone (which I always seemed to lose) out of my bag, and unlocked it. One message from Claire, *delete*. I didn't even bother reading it, she wasn't worth my time. She texted me constantly, and after the few first ones, I just began to ignore her. I did miss her a lot though; she was still technically my best friend. She betrayed me though, and I needed to stop worrying about it. A couple nights ago I was unpacking some more stuff. I found an old birthday card from her from when we were in grade 7. I tried my hardest not to read it, but I eventually gave in.

Dear Emma,

Okay so, you've been my closest friend since grade 4! Yay, that's a long time. I don't think we've ever even been in a fight? Yay, that's a good sign. You're always there for me, and I can always trust you! I love you so much Em. Friends for ever and ever!

Love, Claire

It was just a short message, but it was enough. Enough to make me start sobbing, the kind of sobbing that you do when you realize they won't be coming back.

I was so frustrated for her, like how can one even do that? Here I was half way across the world, if she knew it wasn't going to work out why couldn't she have given me a heads up? I'm angry at myself for barely being mad at her too. Overall I simply missed her and wanted her back in my life, but it was her who did it to me. It was her fault, and she hadn't even tried to defend me. In her mind it would always be her and a guy.

I wanted to cry and scream out to the world, but I know that wouldn't change a thing. The only thing that could change was me, and I didn't want to forgive her. It was up to her to fix this all. 

I started to dial my mom's phone number, hoping that she would be awake. I had gotten a long distance package so that I could call her landline phone. She had also gotten a new laptop recently so we could video chat. It would be as if I hadn't left.

On the third ring, she answered.

"Hello?" It sounds as though she has just woken up.

"Hey, mom. It's me, Emma." My voice shakes, I'm not sure why I'm so nervous.

"Hello sweetheart, how's London been? How's Claire?" Of course. The first thing she brings up Claire.

"Well it's actually been quite good. I, uhm, I'm not living with Claire actually. We chose not to live together." More like she chose. "But, I'm living in my own apartment, it's quite nice, and my landlord got me a job too, which is great. I've met a couple people." I had no siblings so I usually told my mom everything. We felt more like coworkers than family, or like friends. We told everything without consequences. For some reason, I wanted to keep the Claire situation on the down low.