Skin Deep

Chapter 17

Luke

            Amanda is being very quiet. Usually on these drives to school, she has lots to say, especially since the trial. Now she hasn’t said a word and we’ll be at school in about two minutes.

            “What are we doing?” I ask, breaking the silence. Amanda just looks at me and shrugs, saying nothing. I don’t want to press the issue, but the girl is seriously getting on my nerves. “Are you mad about last night? Because you were leaning in, too!”

            Amanda’s jaw drops ad she gets a dark look in her eyes. I don’t care; she’s being immature. “Don’t blame this on me!” She practically shouts. “I don’t even remember you! How should I know that you meant anything to me at all? What if you’re just taking advantage of my weakened emotional state?” She snaps.

            It’s my jaw’s turn to drop. “How can you even say that?” I ask, incredulous. Weakened emotional state? I’m just downright angry as I pull into my usual parking spot at the school. “Amanda, you have absolutely no clue. And why the heck can you remember everyone else except me, huh? Why are you blocking me out? You think I’m only being this nice to you to take advantage of you? Are you serious?” I take a deep breath and think through my next statement before saying, “You really need to start remembering who I am. I’m not sure how much longer I can take this.” Then I get out of the car and slam the door before she can say anything.

            I walk into the school to find Jenna waiting by the water fountain. “Hey, Luke!” She greets me brightly. “Where’s Amanda?”

            “Do I have to keep tabs on her every waking moment of every freaking day?” I retort, mad.

            Jenna doesn’t even stop smiling. Stupid perky Jenna. “Hey now. What did you do?” She asks cheekily.

            “What did I do?” I shoot back. “I didn’t do anything! Ask the emotional whack job over there what’s wrong.” I flick my head back over my shoulder towards where I assume Amanda is now standing. “See you later, Jenna.” I shake my head and walk brusquely away.

            I meet up with a couple of my friends and resolve to avoid Amanda today. It’s probably pretty childish, but I don’t care. She’s being childish, too. I head off to my first class with my buddies in tow, not giving Amanda a second thought.

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            Nope, I’m not thinking about Amanda. Not in the slightest. It’s not as if I see her face around every corner or accidently say her name when I’m trying to say other words. It’s not like every little thing reminds me of her or I wonder if every brunette I see is her. No, I’m not thinking about her at all.

            Alright, who am I kidding? I miss her, I want her, I need her. I’ve been thinking about her every second today. I feel bad and I want more than anything for her not to be mad at me. I don’t care whose fault this is- whatever ‘this’ is. I just want everything to be ok. I wish most of all that I’d never told her I wasn’t sure how much longer I can take this. In all honesty, I would wait forever for her to remember me if it took that long.

            So, in Calculus, I try to talk to her. I try to let her know that it’s ok, that I’m sorry. But I can’t. She’s too busy ignoring me to let me talk to her. Jenna just looks from me to Amanda and back again. “Yikes. Feel that tension,” she says. I glare at her.

            Amanda looks up at Jenna, then at me. Then she has the nerve to roll her eyes. I slump into my seat angrily. Fine. I was being mature for once. I was going to fix this. But fine.