If you've ever wanted to fall away

i give up

You know what? FUCK THIS SHIT-TON PLACE I CALL HOME, THAT WE CALL EARTH. ITS JUST A GIANT PIECE OF SHIT THAT WANTS ME TO SUFFER. SOCIETY WANTS ME TO SUFFER. TO SUFFER IN SILENCE.
I HATE MY LIFE.
But you know what? That doesn't matter anymore because I don't care. 
I don't care who likes me and who hates me. I don't care who wants me alive and who wants me dead. I don't care who wants to see me happy and who wants to see me suffer. You know why world? Because fuck you, fuck the pain you caused me, fuck you for making me fall to the bottom of my suicide ladder for a boy that made me happy, then cause me to jump most of the way up again when he tells me he doesn't love me, fuck you for every time you turned me into a hermit crab and shoved me in a corner where you didn't have to bother with me. I AM NOT GOING TO FUCKING STAND FOR BEING TREATED LIKE SHIT BECAUSE I AM LOVED BY TWO PEOPLE, AND ONLY TWO. THEY ARE MY BEST FRIENDS AND THEY HAVE HELPED ME OFF MY ASS WHEN YOU COULDN'T BE ARSED, YOU SEE WORLD I HAVE A PLAN TO LIVE PAST 19 BECAUSE I WANT TO MAKE IT THROUGH COLLEGE, THROUGH A JOB AND LIFE, AND TO FIND MY SEXUALITY AND SOMEONE WHO LOVES ME FOR WHO I AM, NOT FOR WHO I PRETEND TO BE. my mum doesn't understand, she tells me that wearing boys clothes and liking boys is a phase, when it's obviously not. I can't fucking take it anymore and I hate my life. My mum is pissing me off so much I wish I could kill myself. She wouldn't notice, not for a while anyway. When she does, she is going to act like she cared when she just thinks "I finally got rid off the little shit"