I tended to fall in love with the wrong people at the wrong times, whether it be they were too toxic for me, or I was toxic to them.
I fell in love with the people who came around when they wanted attention and then left when bored. I fell in love with 3am texts and "baby girl I'm sorry, not tonight."
I fell in love with their lust, their desire, when I knew they couldn't and wouldn't feel the same towards me. I fell in love with the "don't do this" and the "don't do that", and became so used to pleasing others before myself. I fell in love with the false promises and the nights of worrying if I was worth their time.
I fell in love with everything that destroyed me.
I fell in love with the protectiveness and need.
I fell in love with the moment.
I fell in love with the wrong circumstances.
And because of that, I've been so terrified to love again.