The Boy Behind the Mask {Delirious}

Chapter 30

Jonathan's P.O.V.

Callum would be delivering her eulogy. He insisted that I do it, believing that he didn't have the right to say much knowing that he hadn't been there for our mother. He was still her son and I refused to be in front of all of my family members while delivering a heartfelt message because I knew that they would not listen. They would only judge. They would judge the stories I'd tell and the way I spoke and the way I moved instead of cherishing the memory of the woman who had raised me.

So Callum had delivered the eulogy with only the utmost respect for our mother. He told stories of her, stories he remembered from when we were younger. He told my story and how I stayed by her side when Callum wasn't around and when our father had left. He told everyone that she raised her youngest son with dignity and love. And by the end, I had never seen so many people cry for someone they had only pretended to care for.

Macy hadn't though. I appreciated that because I needed her strength. I needed her optimism. She sat beside me and rested her head on my shoulder throughout the entire program. It felt like mere seconds before they began to have each row of people walk down the church aisle to view the casket. They started in the back and worked their way up. The only people who were in the first row were Callum, Macy, and I. I refused to have anyone else here.

Then the time came and we were the last row to see her. Everyone else were now sitting at their seats as Macy and I walked hand in hand behind Callum to say a final goodbye to my mother. She was beautiful. They had put barely any makeup on her face as I requested and dressed her in the most elegant white gown. A bouquet of Baby's Breath rested between her hands as she laid still in her white casket. The simple color had been my idea. I wanted to remember the last moment with her as an angel in a sea of black.

Tears began dripping down my cheek and I turned towards Macy, clutching onto her as if she was the only good thing I had left. For the most part, she was. We sat down soon after. The hired program advisor then closed the program and directed people towards the main building where they would be serving an early lunch. Callum had left with them and I followed close behind him. I had almost gone through the door when I realized Macy wasn't following behind me.

I walked behind one of the columns supporting the church building and watched her as she stood beside my mother's casket with teary eyes.

"Jonathan really loved you. I remember him describing you once as the most beautiful angel that could ever live and he was right. You were too good for this world and I'm hoping that you're finally at peace. Thank you for raising such an amazing son and I'll be sure to love him as much as you had," Macy said softly.

Knowing that she probably had wanted this to be private, I snuck out the door and waited for her outside. It was only then that I realized I had been crying even more, but I couldn't bring myself to care.

Macy came running out of the buildings, the tears in her eyes gone now and replaced with a bright smile.

"Where were you?"

"I dropped my bracelet earlier, but I found it," she smiled, raising her wrist to show me the bracelet I had bought for her.

We walked to the main building together where tables amongst tables were set and a self-serve table was placed against the far wall where people lined up to get their food. I sat at a separate table with Macy and saved a seat for Callum. Then I had gotten rid of the other chairs at the table and placed them somewhere else so no one could sit with us.