So long, Helena (MCR Fan Fiction)

So long, Helena- 8 (1996)

October, 1996

It was two weeks after Sean's incident with Rachel. Things between Helena and Sean had been a little tense since their dispute the morning after in the kitchen. They only spoke to each other when absolutely necessary. Which was a little strange for them. They had always been so close. They usually got along really well.

Sean had gotten the whole house cleaned up just as it had been before by the time their parents had gotten home. They didn't suspect a thing. Helena was almost disappointed. She wanted him to get caught. She wanted him to pay for what he did.

"So he was like-"

It was Wednesday morning in late October. On Wednesday, Helena's school did a little thing where they started classes a half hour later. So that way teachers have extra planning time for their lessons once a week.

So Paige and Helena were sitting together in the school's library, not doing anything productive. They were just pretending to look around for books like they did every Wednesday morning, but they never did check anything out. Paige was going on about something that had happened in her maths class yesterday but Helena wasn't paying much attention.

She was now focused entirely on the curly, red hair that stood not too far down the aisle where Paige and Helena were standing.  Helena's stomach did a small flip as she recognized the girl.

"'Ello? Are you listening?"

Paige stood in front of Helena, blocking her view of the other girl. She folded her arms across her chest in frustration.

"Yeah! Yes, I just have to go do something. Hold on a second." Helena stepped around her best friend and started walking in the direction of the mob of red hair.

"Rachel?" Helena said quietly as soon as she was within hearing range.

Rachel Ludder spun around, two books in her left hand and an encyclopedia in the other. Her expression darkened when she recognized Helena. Helena knew damn well why, but she was still a little hurt. Yes, Sean was her brother but Helena didn't want to be known as 'Sean's little sister'. She wanted to be her own person.

Setting aside her own personal problems, she started to speak. "How are you?"

Rachel began to shake her head violently. She closed her eyes and spun back around to look at the books again. "I don't want to be rude, Helena. I really don't. But I don't think that we should be talking right now."

Helena nodded her head but she didn't care. She needed to talk to her. "I understand that but I do believe that-"

"Helena, please just leave me-!"

"I KNOW!" Helena yelled, despite that the both of them were in a library. "I know about what happened."  She swallowed loudly as Rachel spun back around slowly to look at her.

"You know what?"

"I think you know what." Helena blinked a couple of times, shoving her hands into her jacket's pockets. "You and Sean. Two weeks ago. After the football game. I know what he did to you."

Rachel's grip on the books in her hand tightened and she bit her bottom lip, looking down. Almost ashamed.

"You have no idea how pissed off with him I am about it all." Helena said quietly. "I just wanted to know if he-"

"If he raped me?"

Those few words made Helena's throat swell up. She couldn't make out any words. If she did she might strt crying again. She simply nodded.

Rachel looked away, bringing the books up to her chest. Her eyes were beginning to tear up. She didn't respond and they both sat in silence for a few minutes but eventually, Rachel nodded yes. "I have a boyfriend."

Helena's jaw clenched.  Oh gosh. Rachel could go to the police with this. Sean could get in a lot of trouble.  She started to panic. Her whole body was starting to heat up. Mostly with anger.

"I'm so sorry, Rachel. I'm so sorry."

They were both on the verge of crying. Helena quickly turned around and ran out of the library, completely forgetting bout Paige. Tears were spilling down her cheeks. It was Helena's fault. It was all her fault. She let Sean do all this. She let Sean throw his stupid party. She didn't stop them. She didn't help Rachel. She just ran away.

Helena was running down the corridor as fast as she possibly could, pushing past people with unbelievable force. A voice rang in the back of her head as she got closer and closer to the entrance of the school.

'It's because of you.'

The voice got louder with every step she took. Mascara was running down her cheeks by the time that Helena had reached the doors. She pushed them open without any trouble at all. She didn't care that school was gonna start in ten minutes. She didn't care that she was about to skip class for the first time in her entire life. She just kept running. She ran across the field of green grass that was way overdue for being trimmed.

She ran across paved roads, not bothering to look both ways for cars. She just kept going. And when she was well past the point of exhaustion, she pushed herself. She needed to get home. Helena ran until she was at her doorstep. She swung the door open, looking around frantically to see if either her dad or mum were still here.

"MUM!" She called out, dropping her book bag and running up the stairs two at a time. "DAD!" Her voice cracked as she tripped on the last step.

The next thing she knew, her face was smashed against the carpet. She smelt shampoo. The carpet still smelt clean from when Sean had shampooed every part of the house after that night. Helena didn't even bother to pick herself up. All her energy was gone. She curled her legs up into her arms, and layed in a fatal position. She continued to cry. Hot, violent, tears pooled down her cheeks and wet the carpet underneath her face

"MUM!" SHe cried out again. Helena knew that she had already left for work. But she didn't care. She just needed someone to hear her.

After an hour of laying there, crying, and yelling out for her mother, her voice became weak and hoarse. Her eyes were not bloodshot and tired. The girl tried very hard to keep awake, but she couldn't help it. Her eyelids were heavy and she was exhausted.  She finally let go and allowed herself to sleep.

She did not dream. She did not have any nightmares. Her only concern was that she was secretly hoping that she wouldn't wake up.