Today I was playing hide and go seek with nicole and my little brother, I decided to climb a tree, I was about 3 metres above the power lines so maybe 10 metres off the ground and all I could think was do I jump or do I not jump. I dont know why im like this it is annoying and frustrating why on earth cant I just be back to normal...
Is it:
Because I dont deserve it?
Because normal for me is with James?
Because I am fine the way I am?
Because I am happy?
Or
Because I really dont want to be back to the way I was?
I so badly want to burn the letters from James because if I dont then he will always be a part of me and if I do then I will be free.
The fire will set my mind free from all the hurt I have gone through.
I honestly think James is a dick how could he "love" me and hurt me at the same time????
How is this even possible?