As I lay here in bed thinking of how shit life is for me I realise that I have a new routine..
Every night I go to sleep either crying and thinking about what happened with James or just lieing there feeling numb and empty.
I havnt gone to sleep happy for months.
I cant bear to tell mum I am still feeling horrible I just want her to think I am okay then she will be happy.
I just want her to be happy. She deserves it
