My Dirty Little Secret

Secret Sixty-Two: Haunted House?

"At~su~shi~" Osamu Dazai called while sliding his arms around the male.

"What do you want? I know that face, you want to do something, and it'll be something I don't like," he groaned. Why did he decide it was okay to join Port Mafia all those years ago? This band had to be the worst thing that ever happened to him.

"Let's go on a date!~" he smiled innocently. Of course it wasn't a date, no it was more like a 'I'mgoingtotortureyousoletmetakeyouout' kind of thing. Atsushi sighed, not really wanting to do this. Couldn't he just have a nice cup of tea, in his room, alone, with no Osamu to bother him? For once? No?

"You took me to see that horror movie last week, despite me telling you I hate that sort of thing, so what now? Can't you just ask Gilbert? You like torturing him too, don't you?" Atsushi suggested. He apologized to Gilbert in his mind but someone had to save him from Osamu Dazai.

"Gilbert is on a date of his own," Osamu sighed deeply and pouted. That pouty-face got Atsushi every damn time. This guy was such a jerk but he was an adorable jerk. Curse the gods for giving him that face.

"Fiiiinnnnneee," he accepted defeat, "so where are you taking me this time?"

"Toahauntedhouse," Osamu mumbled, if Atsushi heard him, he might reconsider. 

"What? You guys are going out together again?" Chuuya walked in. If these two kept going out on dates like this, he would never get a chance to get closer to Osamu.

"I disapprove," Ryunosuke Akutagawa brushed Osamu off of Atsushi and hugged him instead, "we're coming too," he spoke on Chuuya's behalf. The guy wanted to speak up but Ryunosuke had read him perfectly. He didn't know if the guy knew about his feelings or if Ryunosuke was just using him to keep Osamu away from Atsushi.

"Ehhhh? I didn't realize you two wanted to go to a haunted house that badly," Osamu quickly covered his mouth. He let it slip that was where they were going. Atsushi glared.

"Damn you suicidal potato," he grumbled, "I told you I don't like those sorts of things!" the male attempted to throw a book at him, but Osamu dodged.

"It's okay Atsushi, I will protect you from all of the monsters," Ryunosuke promised, hugging him tighter. Chuuya bit his nails, he wanted to go but he also hated those things. He imagined trying to cling to Osamu because he was scared. It was a nice thought but reality kicked in. Osamu wouldn't be the type to protect him, he would be the type to laugh at him and run away. Chuuya sighed, hating that he had fallen for that kind of person. Ultimately he decided to suffer through it, for the sake of not allowing Atsuhi to have Osamu all to himself.

Little did they know there was an easy solution to all of their problems.

It's called a foursome.

Unfortunately, not everyone was up for that (sorry Alois, your dreams didn't come true).

"I'm already regretting this," Atsushi was only looking at the 'haunted prison' and he knew it would be terrible for him. Osamu grinned, this was everything he was hoping for. The more the merrier. The more people he could convince to come along, the more people he could terrorize. 

"This is going to be wonderful," Osamu clapped his hands together and walked to the ticket booth, buying each of them a badge showing they paid.

"This is going to be terrible," Atsushi and Chuuya spoke in unison.

Osamu rushed right into the war zone of supernatural terror. Ryunosuke followed Atsushi while Chuuya was mustering up the courage to go after Osamu.

"Atsushi," Ryunosuke spoke, "if you want you can hold my hand," he blushed lightly, though Atsushi couldn't see in the dim lighting.

Instead of grabbing his hand, he clung to his arm, trying desperately not to scream at the various items hanging around, "t-t-than-k-ks." 

"I'm going to die," Chuuya's soul nearly left his body ten times now.

"If you die I will give you a proper burial," Osamu declared, "but you can't die, you promised to help me find someone for my elegant double suicide!" the male reminded him.

"Hah? When did I say that?"

"Oh, you're right, maybe that was a dream..." Osamu thought about it for a while, unable to come to a conclusion about whether it really happened.

"You have dreams of me?" Chuuya wanted to think that meant something but instead he shuddered at what the dreams consisted of. Nothing good came out of Osamu's brain.

Osamu didn't want to answer that question, nor did he have to. A skeleton dropped from the ceiling in front of them. Chuuya screamed, like the little girl he was. He clung to Osamu for dear life. The male wasn't prepared for that and he fell to the floor. Chuuya landing on top of him, lips 'accidentally' meeting each other.

Chuuya froze, blushing in the dim light. This couldn't be happening. The hat he was wearing slid off, making his hair fall into his face. The soft noise of the hat meeting the floor echoed through the halls. Chuuya separated the two but continued to hover closely over Osamu's face. He hadn't been this close to him before.

"I, uh," Chuuya began to come up with some sort of excuse but nothing came to mind, "thanksforcatchingme," he blurted out. The male scrambled to his feet, half tempted to hit his head against the wall because of his embarassment.

Osamu grabbed the male's hat from off the floor, placing it on Chuuya's head, he grabbed his hand and led him out of the prison. Not a word more was spoken between the two. 

"You guys sure took your time," Atsushi ran over to them.

"Shhh, Atsushi, they were having an 'intimate' moment..." Ryunosuke whispered, not-so-quietly. The white-haired male blushed at what that could mean. Many things came to mind, none of them being a kiss.

"W-well, anyway, we should probably go back before Ranpo kills us..."

"I approve this message," Chuuya raised his hand in agreement. His hat was on his head in such a way that it covered his red face. Chuuya hoped he could act like usual but that was proving to be a tall order.

Osamu was dense, yeah?