My Dirty Little Secret

Secret Sixty-Eight: Truth

Ciel woke up in a room he'd never seen before. He groaned in annoyance as a sharp pain ran through his skull. Trying to remember the events of the day before, he sat up and looked around. His clothes were different, everything had changed, the only thing that remained was his eye-patch. It was like some strange dream. 

The door opened and a woman entered, smiling warmly, "rise and shine, my son," she said. Ciel squinted, there was no doubting it, this was his mother. Rachel. But why did that thought seem odd to him? Why was it strange for this woman to be here?

"Where am I?" he asked, clearly confused.

"Where are you?" she giggled, "such a silly question to ask. Darling, this is your home, don't you remember?" she continued to smile. Remember? Remember what? Memories flooded Ciel's mind, he understood now but somehow, these memories seemed too good to be true. Ciel struggled to stand up but nearly fell over. Rachel caught him, he was wrapped in his mother's warm embrace. Why did this feel like the first time he had ever been hugged by her? They were close, like they always had been...but this still felt so foreign.

"Are you okay? You seem a little lost," Rachel's voice filled with concern. Ciel's eyes teared up, he hugged her close, unsure of what to think. His instinct was telling him this was all wrong but his heart wanted it to be real.

Rachel led him to the dining room, a large breakfast had been prepared for him. He stared in awe, things he hadn't eaten in years sat there, along with all of his favorite foods. Ciel drooled longingly.

"Enjoy," Rachel smiled, sitting down and gesturing to the items. She watched in amusement as her child shoved the food in his face. Not a single thought of confusion filled his mind. A sharp pain ran through his skull once more. Something was wrong, yes, he sensed it, but he couldn't pinpoint the error. 

"Please tell me what is troubling you," Rachel spoke. Ciel figured he might as well ask her about it, perhaps she would know what the problem was. 

"Something seems wrong," he said, speaking the truth, "like something is missing..."

Rachel looked down at her hands, folding and unfolding them, she seemed sad for a reason Ciel didn't understand, "I know it has been hard on you, since your father walked out on us all those years ago. I had hoped that marrying Chlaus might fill that gap but it seems I can't just replace that man," tears fell on her hands. Ciel immediately felt guilty and placed one of his hands over her's, as an attempt to comfort her.

He remembered now, how wrong it had all been. Rage filled him, his father had left them, walked out, with all of their money. It was no wonder he hadn't had food like this in a while. It wasn't till Chlaus had rescued him that they could return to a happier lifestyle. Ciel was angry at himself for forgetting. 

He hated Vincent Phantomhive.

Ciel stood up and wrapped his arms around Rachel, he held her close, "it's not your fault he left," Ciel began, "I don't blame you. I love you Mother. I'm sorry that I said anything..."

Rachel sobbed more into Ciel's arms. She cried without an ounce of self-control. Ciel felt worse. How could he have caused his loving mother such torment? Little did he know, that these weren't actually tears of sadness but tears of joy. She was happy to hear something like this from her son. Happy for the words she knew could never be true.

"Miss," a lady spoke softly, she was dressed in white from head to toe. Her hair covered in a multitude of roses, the same roses lining the bottom of her dress, she smiled holding out a box of tissues.

Rachel turned her head, not wanting to leave the hug given to her by Ciel. The boy patted her head, assuring her it would be fine. Rachel removed herself and accepted the box, blowing her nose tissue by tissue.

"Thank you Doll," she smiled. The girl stood, expressionless, taking the tissue-box back and walking off. Ciel stared after her, wondering how she had managed to sneak up on them. Who was she? Ciel blushed lightly as he stared after her.

Rachel chuckled next to her son, "you should tell her how you feel," she said.

"Huh?!" Ciel blushed more. No, he didn't like her like that! Of course not! No, no, no, he just found her pretty...that's all, nothing more. Besides, Ciel felt as if there was someone else that he loved, but he couldn't remember who exactly that was.

In the corner of his eye, Ciel noticed an elderly male. He hadn't seen him before and was a bit startled, Rachel noticed this, "it's just the butler," she said. 

'the butler'

Ciel flinched at those words. He put a hand to his chest and looked down, why did they cause his heart to beat faster? Why was his face flushing more than before? Something was odd, something was wrong, something about this whole day was everything but normal.

An image flashed in his mind, a male. This male with raven-black hair and shining red eyes. Ciel couldn't make out much of his face other than that. His eyes shone so brightly. Ciel wondered if he had been possessed the night before, for nothing seemed to add up. An individual, whom he had never met, was now invading his thoughts. 

Ciel couldn't fathom it all, his mind flooded itself with confused ideas. The pain increased and his eye-sight blurred. His head throbbed stronger than ever. Ciel cried out, falling to the floor. He wished the pain would stop, only to have it increase. Why was this happening to him? What had he done wrong? Ciel looked at his hands, staring at them. Were those rings? Why did he have those? He stared at the blue one, specifically, it was too big for his fingers and only fit on his thumb. Where had he gotten these? From whom? He recognized them, he knew they were his father's but his father had left. So how did he get these? If he hadn't seen his father in years?

There were only two possibilities.

These rings were fake.

Or Rachel was lying.

But why would his mother lie about something to him? Weren't they close as a mother and son?

His brain only hurt along with his head. He decided to stop trying to figure this all out. Ciel fell to the floor, his consciousness slipping away.