The Hated Sin

Three: Her Mother

It would take approximately seven days in the carriage to reach the borders to the Country of Fire, in that time, there were rest stops previously arranged in the Land of Rice Paddies and the Country of Wind. Those rest stops would extend the seven day trip to nearly three weeks. Tsumi stared down at the neatly tied, yellowing parchment in her lap. Finally, she made up her mind and untied the bow that bound the paper closed. And as she read the letter, she made another decision; she didn't have a mother either.
'My dear Tsumi,
If you are reading this, it means I am dead. I'm sure that you have a lot of questions, but many of them will remain unanswered. I suppose I must have died in child birth, if not I was likely killed by your father after he found out that you were not a male. I suppose it's for the best that I am no longer alive, I wouldn't have been a good mother to a child I never wanted. I was forced into becoming the emperor's concubine to pay off a debt my father owed. I guess bad father's run in the family. After becoming the emperor's concubine, I was treated with high respect and I was pampered as I wished, but all of those luxuries came with a price. The fourth month of my residence within the palace, I was raped, by the emperor, your father. I gave birth first to your elder brother. After which, I was ordered not to become pregnant again. But pregnancy wasn't something I could control, especially considering that I was to please the emperor whenever he saw fit. So despite his orders, I became pregnant again, with you. When he discovered I was once again pregnant, he ordered me only to bear a son, but I bore you instead. I never wanted to be the emperor's concubine, and I never wanted to have children, and yet I brought you into this world only to leave you. For that, I am deeply sorry. As a constant reminder to you of what you were born into, I named you Tsumi. You are my little sin. The sin of the shadows.
-Mother'