Escape from Tragedy

Chapter 15: Drama

"You are a nobody, worthless and waste of space!" He slurred his words. He's drunk like every night and every night I'm here taking his words like punches.

"Your drunk" I told him getting up from the couch to go to bed. I'm not dealing with this tonight.

"Where do you think your going?" He said grabbing my arm and throwing me back onto the couch forcefully.

"What the hell is your problem?! Don't you ever touch me!" I yelled at him. He's lost his damn mind! But little did I know lashing out on him would give me the biggest bruise on my cheek.

I gasped for air and sat up so fast, looking  around the room forgetting where I was. My breathing is so hard you could hear it in this silent room. Sweat rolling down my face and back. I can't believe I had a nightmare, but it wasn't a nightmare it's my reality. My "dreams" are not even dreams anymore, they are my reality that haunt me.

It's like every time I'm even close to becoming my self or happy I take five steps back. There's no use to even trying I feel like. Why try when it's hopeless. There's no point anymore...

I got out of bed knowing I wouldn't be able to go back to sleep. I walked to the bathroom to shower  and brush my teeth. I don't know how long I was in the shower but the warm water relax my tense muscles. I leaned against the wall closing my eyes and blocking out the noise, but can't block out the emotions that coming through.

The guilt, hopeless, loneliness, and most of all just regret. All these emotions coming at me like a ton of bricks. I let it out, the tears rolling down my cheek mixing in with the water, my body sliding down the title wall onto the floor. I brought my legs in and wrapped my arms around myself. I let it out, because the only thing I can do is cry, cry that everything that happened sevens months ago is my fault! I'm the one who caused all this.

Everyone tells me it wasn't my fault and I try to believe them but I know it is my fault. I was the one who brought this on and now I'm all alone.

I have my family in North Carolina and my cousins along with Logan, Chase and now Eva. But I still have this feeling of loneliness, that I think I'll always have.

After some time I pulled myself together and got out the shower. Dried my body off and put on my black leggings and matching top. I decided to blow dry my hair instead of air drying it. Once I was done with that, I went downstairs to make some coffee hoping that will get ride of the headache I have.

"Morning" Amilia said while pouring herself a cup of coffee.

"Morning" I said walking more into the kitchen, my voice couldn't have been any more horsed. "Is there anymore coffee?"

"Yes, do you want a croissant ? I'm going to warm some up"

"Ooo yes please " I told her while making my cup of coffee.

" what are you doing today?" Amilia asked me while taking the croissants out along with other breakfast stuff.

"I'm going to go hang out with Lola, you ?" I asked her while I sat down on the bar stool.

"Chase and I are going to go shopping and go sight seeing. Basically go be tourist" she told me while cutting potatoes.

"Awe that's cool you guys are finally able to be together" I told her.

"Same girl, we need this vacation and just being together" she said agreeing with me.

"You guys do, but I don't get why he doesn't try to make more time for you. Don't get me wrong I love Chase, he's perfect for you but that's one of his flaws I don't understand."  I explained to her.