She Wouldn't Say Goodbye. (Guns N' Roses)

Thirty Six

-Kat-

It was around eight at night, I had worked a day shift at the strip club. Taking the keys out of my bag, I unlocked our front door, automatically not hearing any sounds from inside. Usually, Axl and Izzy were both at home around this time of night, unless one of them had a girl they were seeing or some 'odd' job to go do. I threw my stuff down on the edge of the couch, flicking the side lamp on. Ever since the robbery at the Gas station, I was weary about spending too much time alone, before that incident I had never doubted if I could take care of myself or not. Now I doubted, I thought of my defenses and found that even though I was pretty street smart. I was still a small framed woman and couldn't fight off a large grown man.

Before letting my mind run any further, I decided to pick some stuff off the floor. Putting all the dirty clothes into one pile in the corner for laundry day. This place was a lice infested hell-hole but I didn't want any of the guys stage clothes to continue to lay on this nasty floor. After collecting everything up, I put it all into a large garbage bag. Afterwards I decided to put Pajamas on, finding an old tee of either Axl's or Izzy's laying on the edge of the bed. It actually smelled alright. My feet had been hurting for the later part of the day, and I was so ready to lay down. I went over to the 'living area', turning the Television onto some random movie or something, before getting comfortable on the couch. 

-

I don't know when it was I had dozed off, My eyes strained in the dim living room, the TV still on. I glanced over at the clock it was a little past midnight. Then I heard the front door rattling. Someone outside twisting the nob forcefully. I was wide awake now.  "Let me in!" Was slurred and muffled from the other side. I walked over to it opening the door, without taking the chain off.  "Who's out here?" Suddenly the door jerked forward, making me jump back. "It's just me, Kitty." Izzy slurred. I instantly took the chain off, watching as he slumped against the door frame. "Fuck- Iz, where have you been?"  His clothes were a messy disarray, his eyes bloodshot. "I ju-st went out for'a drink." He walked through the door, shutting it behind himself.  His clumsy hands began fiddling with the locks we had placed on the door.  "Here, let me." I took the chain from his hand and secured the door. "What's wrong with you, Iz?" He shook his head.  "Noth-ing." he sat down on the arm of the sofa. "Where's Axl?" Izzy shook his head. "Asshole, I don' know where he' went. He was ere' playing with 'Slash' when I dodged out." Izzy said, as he began fumbling trying to take his black boots off. "That guitar player?" I questioned, leaning down to help Izzy with his shoes. He nodded his head, "Probably went to fucking stay wi' him." Izzy reached into his shirt pocket for a pack of Marlboro Reds, lifting the pack to his lips to retrieve a smoke. "I didn't know they were hanging out?"  I asked, placing both of Izzy's shoes down beside me.  He shrugged, lighting his cigarette up, blowing a large plume of smoke out of his mouth.  "Apparently they're tight."  Izzy slurred.  "Oh, well." I got up from the floor, watching Izzy hold his cigarette between his teeth as he undid the two remaining buttons on his shirt.  "I'm tired tonight." I told him, leaning on the couch. "Let's go ta' bed then?"  Izzy stood up from the arm of the couch, "You know' I thought- I was a whole lot more intoxicated then I actually am." He began undoing his belt as he walked into the 'bedroom' space. "What kind of shit is that, I can't even get drunk anymore." I followed behind him, wondering what the hell he was talking about. "Trust me, Iz. I've seen you pretty damn drunk."  Izzy threw himself down on the bed, getting comfortable.  I nestled in beside him, putting my head on his arm.  "I probably smell fuckin' bad." He laughed, pulling the leg of his boxers down.  "Eh, you do smell pretty bad. It's fine though."  He grinned, grabbing me tightly against his slightly sweaty chest.  We lay in comfortable silence like that for a while, I wrapped one of my arms around his waist. "Can I admit something to you Izzy?"  Even though the room was pitch dark, I looked towards his face. "Anything."  I wriggled out of his grasp, resting myself on his chest.  "I'm sort of scared of being alone anymore. I'm glad that you came back tonight."  He didn't say anything for a while. "I don't want you to be afraid, I've always been there for you. And I always will be. I mean- I have the reputation of being a loner, but I care about you, Axl- he does too. As long as you're here, with us, or me I know nothing will happen to you." He paused to laugh, "Fuck- maybe I have had to much to drink."  My eyes felt glassy, I pressed my face tightly to Izzy's chest. "I appreciate that even more coming from you though, I mean- you hardly ever say your feelings. To know you care about me, for you to tell me you do,- It means so much. Because I know you do." I closed my eyes, willing the tears to stop before they could arrive. He didn't say anything else, but he pressed a firm, slow kiss to my temple. We continue to lay in silence, until we drifted off to sleep.