*Lindsey's POV*
I stepped out of the shower, running a towel roughly over my curls. Today was an absolute shock. I couldn't believe that fate lead me back to her. She was so beautiful standing there, so full of life. And I had to say the most ridiculous thing that could come out of my mouth and ruin it all. Of all the ways I'd played that scene in my head with her over the years, I have to say that a sleazy pick up line and a swim in the ocean weren't involved.
I glanced over to my balcony where my soaked clothes remained- so much for those boots and my leather jacket. I smirked a bit, we always had been able to bring that out in each other. While it wasn't my first choice of emotions, I guess I should be glad she even cares enough to be mad at me. I realized I needed a plan, but I wasn't sure where to go from here.
I sat down in a chair on the balcony of my condo, putting my feet up on the railing and leaning back, staring out over the city. The house was quiet and dark, and I sat in the still, my mind racing, as the sun set over the Pacific and the lights came up. I smoked a joint to take the edge off, as I was still worked up from my earlier encounter.
I should probably let sleeping dogs lie. I should go to bed, wake up with a fresh perspective, and then determine what to do. But that's not me. That's not her. And that's definitely not us.
I grabbed my wallet and keys, tossing on a thin leather jacket from the hall closet and jumping in my car. I stopped for a bouquet of flowers, selecting a delicate grouping of daisies and drove to the marina. I let myself onto the dock using the gate code that John gave me earlier, keeping my bearings about me. I knew this was a risky move and I couldn't let things blow up again. I just wanted to give her all my love.
I stood behind the sailboat, noticing some of her obviously Stevie touches, such as the cafe lights strung about in her helm. I stared at the blue letters painted on the back. 'Frozen Love, Port of Marina del Rey' contemplating some of the possible meanings behind that, and hoping that on some level it meant she hadn't completely given up. I stepped onboard, honestly unsure of where to go from here. There wasn't a front door for me to ring the bell, per say, so I knocked somewhat softly on the hatch.
"Coming," she responded quietly.
I could tell she was startled at the very least to see me, but I couldn't take my eyes off of her. She was just so beautiful, standing there with no makeup and her natural waves trailing down her back. She immediately stepped outside and closed the hatch behind her, tightening her black silk rob a bit closer to cover herself.
"Lindsey, what are you doing here?" She was already whisper yelling. I had to act fast.
"Stevie, look, I just wanted to come by and tell you I'm sorry about earlier. I didn't mean to ambush you and trust me when I tell you that I have always hoped that would have gone a lot differently." I knew I had to talk fast. i had to get it out before things escalated again. "I have mad so many mistakes with you, and I know you're mad at me- and you have every right to be, but I just came by to see if we could talk. Calmly. Please..." I stood and studied her face. "Oh, um, these are for you." I handed her the flowers and she smiled.
I could tell she was really trying to figure out what to do, mulling over what to say to me.
She looked at the ground, shifting her weight and crossing her arms. "Lindsey, I'm sorry about this morning. I am. But I just don't know..."
"Just give me a little bit of your time. I'm sure you've got a lot going on, and Stevie I know you probably never want to see me again, but I'm just asking for one evening. It's not a date, I'm not trying to put any pressure on you. I know I've done a lot of bad things and its been a long time but in the end you're still my friend. I just- I miss you."
She finally looked up at me, so much hurt in those beautiful brown eyes and I knew that I'd put it there. When I look into her eyes, it's like watching the night sky. There's so much they hold and just like them old stars I see that she's come so far to be right where she is. Eventually she gave me a solemn nod of acceptance, though I could tell she was hesitant to do so. "Alright," she whispered, a catch in her throat. "Okay."
I was ecstatic. I couldn't have wiped the smile off my face if I tried. "Alright. Great. So, lets grab a drink. Its a beautiful night."
She looked like a deer in the headlights "Lindsey, no, I mean, I'd love to go out, but it's not a good time for me right now." She closed her robe a little tighter, uneasily looking towards the cabin of her boat.
Message received. "Understood," I told her, hating that a blushed a little. Of course, I'm sure she wasn't alone. I shouldn't have expected her to be single, I just didn't want to think about it.
"Oh, no," She almost laughed. "It's not that I just- I can't tonight. Thursday? Pick me up at 8?"
"Sounds great," I beamed. "See you then."
I didn't know how to leave it, but fortunately she took sympathy on me and actually reached in for a gentle hug, putting an end to my concern over the situation. She had always been so warm, and so comforting. It had always been so natural for us, and this was no exception.
She briefly rest her head on my chest and giggled a bit, causing me to ask what was wrong.
"Nothing," she responded softly. "You just still smell the same- like aftershave and pot."
I smirked. It wasn't exactly a confession of undying love but I'd take what I could get from her at this point. We were reconnecting.
"I'll see you tomorrow, Lindsey," she told me sweetly, giving my hand a squeeze as she let go of me, turning and walking back inside.
I was elated to say the least, on cloud nine and too excited to go home. I wandered down to John's slip, as I'd never made it over on my initial visit to the marina today. I looked around but he wasn't here, the boat locked up for the night. I hung out on the end of the dock for a moment, taking in the ocean breeze and the night sky. Even though this was the last possible place I expected to find her, I could see her draw to this little sanctuary. It was serene here, and she'd always been calmed by the ocean. I'd always wanted her to be happy. he'd needed her space to do some navigating, and she seemed like she'd really found her niche here.
I strolled back up the dock, pausing briefly again outside Frozen Love. I could see the light still on. I stopped and listened, my brow furrowed. I heard crying again. I took a few steps closer and realized it was coming from inside her boat. Oh my god. She has a baby. Stevie has a baby. She- she... I wasn't sure if I could comprehend that. It's been years, yes, but I just didn't think that much had changed.
I shook my head, shaking my thoughts away.
I don't wanna be someone who walks away so easily. I'm here to stay and make the difference that I can make. We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in. I had to learn what I've got, and what I'm not and who I am. I won't give up on us, even if the skies get rough. I won't give up on us.
