Jealous | Dan Howell

13

Rain beats against Dan's bedroom window as I hold him close to me in his bed.

I smile, "This reminds me of that Colbie Caillat song, Bubbly."

I feel him caress my cheek, "Sing it for me."

"Fine. But only a small bit." I clear my throat. "The rain is falling on my window pane, but we are hiding in a safer place, under covers staying drying and warm, you give me feelings that I adore."

I look to him and my smile turns to a frown when I think I see a tear stream down his cheek. "...Come to think of it, I'm not feeling the bubbliest right now."

I shake my head and feel myself start to cry, as well, "Dan, please, don't cry. I'll come back as soon as I can."

Within the week and a half that Maiara and I had left in London, Dan asked me to be his girlfriend, and we grew closer, if that's even possible. We're practically joined at the hip now, and I'm going to feel like total shit when we break apart.

"I was fine until I told you to sing. Dammit, I'm going to miss you so much, and your beautiful voice," he wipes the tear off of his cheek and sighs.

I lean in and hug him, now in tears, "I'm going to miss you, too, Dan." It's silent until I lean back from our hug, "I'm going outside for a bit."

"In the rain?"

I nod, "I love being out in the rain, especially without an umbrella. It relaxes me." I stand up and slip on my shoes, "I'll be back in a few minutes."

As I step outside into the crisp London air, I frown. The fresh air here in London is so much better than in LA. God, I'm going to miss this place.

I push back my wet hair and lean against the wall, looking up towards the dark sky. I close my eyes and take a few deep breaths. People who hate the rain are crazy. How can anyone hate anything that makes them feel so calm?

I hear the door open, and feel someone grab my hand. I look forward and open my eyes to see Maiara, and I'm not a hundred percent sure because of the rain, but I think she's crying. "Are you ready?"

I shake my head and she sniffles, hugging me. "I don't want to leave them."

"Me either."

We hug until the door opens again, "Maiara, can Dan and I have a second with Rachel?" I hear Phil's voice.

She nods and heads back inside as Phil and Dan take her place.

The door shuts and Phil hugs me, "Thank you so much."

I smile, "For what?"

"For bringing Maiara along with you, for helping me meet my best friend."

I see Dan glare at him and I let out a small laugh, "Your best friend, next to Dan."

"Yeah," he leans back and looks at Dan, "You know you're still my best friend."

He loses the glare and nods, "Yeah, I know, Phil. ... Um, can you give us a minute?"

He nods and walks back into the building.

Dan looks down at me, "I don't want you to leave."

I nod, "I know, but I have to. I'll come back, though. As soon as possible."

"What can I say to convince you to stay?" He whispers, pulling me closer to him.

Something that I wish you would say but you won't because you don't feel the same way.

"Dan, I have to go back. I have a shit ton of work to do when I get back to make up for the time I've been gone. If I don't go back, I'm going to lose my job."

He gently grabs my face and leans in, right when his lips touch mine there's a roll of thunder, like something straight out of a movie.

I lean back seconds later and blink, "That was amazing."

"Please, Rachel..." he tilts my chin up and I make eye contact with him, "Don't leave."

I frown, "I told you, I have to go."

"I love you."

Oh my god.

I guess he does feel the same way.

I feel more tears escape my eyes and I sigh, looking down, "You said the one thing that I thought that you would never say, the one damn thing that would convince me to not leave."

"So, you're staying?" He sounds a little happier but I shake my head.

"I can't. If I had a job that I hated, I would stay in a heartbeat. But this...this job I have now, is my dream come true. I don't want to lose it."

He sighs, "Well, if you can't stay here, I guess I'm just going to have to go to LA with you."

I look up, "You're going to what?"

He shrugs, "Phil and I haven't been on holiday for a long time. I'm sure he'll be fine with going."

I smile and hug him, "Oh, my god. This is going to be great. I know you've been to LA before but I get to show you all of my favorite places you might not have been to. Oh, my god, let's go tell Phil and Maiara."

I excitedly grab him by the arm and pull him back into the building.

As soon as we reach the apartment, we barge in to find Phil and Maiara kissing on the sofa.

"Oh, shit." Dan says, grabbing me and quickly pulling me to his room.

I giggle and hug him, "I think they're cute, but I think we're cuter."

He kisses my forehead and smirks, "I think I agree."

I grab my suitcases and make sure I have everything while Dan packs his things.

"So...how long do you think you'll stay?" I ask.

He shrugs, "I don't know. I'll just pack for two weeks. I might stay for longer, though, if you and Maiara don't mind."

"Of course we won't mind. Earlier she was telling me how much she didn't want to leave you and Phil."

A faint knock is heard on Dan's door, "Rachel," Maiara says, "are you ready?"

I open the door and see Phil, slightly smiling, "Um, Maiara and I were wondering if Dan and I could come back with you for awhile." He says.

"Dan and I were thinking the exact same thing. Of course you guys can come and stay with us." I smile and pull them both in for a hug.

When I lean back, I look to Phil, "Go pack your things, then. Our flight leaves in..." I check my phone and gasp slightly. "An hour. Oh, god. What if we don't make it? What if there's not any extra tickets available?"

Dan chuckles, "Calm down, love. If something happens we're not able to board the same plane, we'll just catch the next one."

I let out a small laugh and shake my head, "Right. I'm just so glad you're able to come with us," I smile and hug him. "I love you, Dan."

He leans down and gives me a quick, passionate kiss, "I love you, too, Rachel."

I hear Maiara quietly 'aww' to herself, "I just love...love."

~~~