Crystal Eyes || m.h [COMPLETED]

TWENTY-SEVEN

I gripped onto Matty the whole drive back to London, which was two hours. Somehow we managed to fit ourselves in one bunk, and we stayed like that the whole drive.

Matty rubbed my back, his fingers occasionally spinning small circles. I heard everyone else talking in the front of the bus, but I couldn't find myself to let go of Matty.

Matty breathed steadily, and I did not. I found myself not breathing at times, then breathing too often. Matty noticed too, and he touched my back reminding me to breathe at times.

I squeezed Matty's shirt tightly, remembering the things I'm afraid of.

"Hey," Matty whispered. "It's okay, baby... I promise."

I shook my head, burrowing my head in Matty's chest. Matty kissed the top of my head, assuring me everything was okay.

I felt tears in my eyes once again, and Matty let them fall on his shirt, not complaining. "Are you staying at my house tonight?" Matty whispered. I nodded in response.

"We can watch a movie," Matty smiled. "Or we can sleep... I'm fine with either one." I smiled, nodding. "I'm sorry."

"Stop," I mumbled. "Stop apologizing..."

"It's my fault," Matty replied.

"No it's not," I squeezed Matty's shirt. "If it was this wouldn't be happening right now."

Matty nodded, rubbing my back. "I love you, Sarilynn Bethany Jone."

"I love you too, Matthew Timothy Healy."

- Matty's POV -

Sarilynn fell asleep on the way to our apartment complex, which was distracting for me. I'm not creepy, I just simply like watching Sarilynn sleep. She's so peaceful and perfect looking, even with her red cheeks and nose.

As I pulled into the apartment complex, I turned off the car and got out. I walked to the other side of the car and picked up Sarilynn in my arms.

She stirred a bit, but gave up, falling back asleep. I carried Sarilynn up the stairs, making sure I don't trip.

I reached my door and somehow managed to unlock my door with one hand.

Once inside, I kicked the door closed with my foot, then set Sarilynn on my bed. My sweatpants hung up on her hips and my white shirt loosely hanging off of her seemed to make her more comfortable. I don't get it.

I left my room, turning off the light. I walked into the kitchen and opened the fridge, grabbing a bottle of wine.

I poured myself a glass, slowly sipping it as I sat on the kitchen counter. My mind kept going back to the dressing room, where Sarilynn had cried and had been alone when she needed someone, me.

I quickly finished up the glass, then I absent-mindedly threw it in the sink, shattering it. I cursed under my breath.

I reached for the trash can, picking up the pieces and throwing them into the bin.

"Matty? Is everything alright?"

Sarilynn tiredly approached me, making me feel worse about myself. I harshly picked up a piece of glass and felt it pierce my skin.

"Shit!" I yelled.

"Matty," Sarilynn took the bin from my uninjured hand, setting it down. Sarilynn grabbed my finger and looked at it, then she looked up at me. "Don't be mad at yourself, please Matty."

I avoided eye contact as Sarilynn turned on the sink water, holding my finger under it. "You don't need to help me. I didn't help you," I stated.

Sarilynn looked up at me. "Matty," she shook her head. "It's not your fault. You didn't do anything. I could've been fine if-"

"Stop," I interrupted. "Don't finish that... you can't help them."

"Well if I wasn't as fucking scared-"

"Sarilynn," I begged. "Please. Don't be mad at yourself. You didn't do anything wrong, I did."

"No you didn't," Sarilynn shook her head, tears in her eyes. "If you knew how it would've affected me you wouldn't have done it... it's not your fault."

"I love you," I stated.

Sarilynn looked up at me, and I noticed the small tears brimming in her eyes. I slowly moved my thumb up to her eyes, wiping them away. Sarilynn grabbed my hand, and I noticed how she was shaking.

"Sari," I responded.

Sarilynn's eyes quickly met mine, "You never call me that."

I felt a small smile on my lips. "I don't," I nodded. "Do you like it?"

"No."

Sarilynn grabbed my first aid kit that Mum put in here during one of her visits. Sarilynn grabbed the alcohol and dabbed it on a cotton swab.

Sarilynn grabbed my finger, looking up to my eyes to see I was looking at her. "Only call me Sarilynn," Sarilynn stated.

I smiled, nodding. I ignored the pain that I felt on my finger, her words wrapping around my mind. Sarilynn placed a bandaid over the cut then put away the kit.

Sarilynn picked up the bin and began to toss out the rest of the glass, scaring me. She finished and washed her hands.

Sarilynn turned to me and sighed, "Go change, you're still in your jeans."

I nodded, and Sarilynn followed behind me. Sarilynn crawled into my bed, her eyes watching me as I slid off my jeans and threw off my shirt. I laid down next to Sarilynn, and I felt her fingertips on my chest.

"Do you think they like me?" Sarilynn whispered as I scooted closer to her.

"Yes," I smiled. "Everyone loves you, me included."

Sarilynn looked up from my chest and smiled, "I love you too."

"Sorry I worried you," I interlaced Sarilynn and I's fingers.

"Matty," Sarilynn sighed. "I love you. And if I love you and I'm strong enough... I'll have to deal with it. I'm willing to do so."

I smiled, pressing my lips to Sarilynn's. "After you ran off stage, I asked the crowd how they felt about you. They all said they loved you."

Sarilynn looked up at me in denial. "What?"

"I obviously couldn't hear them individually, but they all wanted you to come back onstage," I smiled. "You were so nervous and they related to you."