When I had first come to you, to tell you what was going on with me, I was nervous and scared of what you would say to me. Whether you would yell at me and push me away or pull me close and tell me it was okay. That was a month ago, and now as I lay beside your slumbering self I realize that I had nothing to fear from telling you; but what I feared was my parents reaction, your parents reaction, my friends reaction. I had feared that I would be shunned for what was happening to me, to us. I am beside you now though, and your snoring might be a pain but at least you where there. I was scared of being completely alone with no one there to support me. I was lonely at times, yes; realizing that it was me and you, and four other people that were supporting me. I was a terrified of the stories I had heard from others, about their entire support system leaving them when they where in need. My family did leave me when I needed them but you where there waiting in the car on the driveway to save me from having nothing. Some of our friends lost it when we told them we had made a decision. A decision that involved us having a major fight with both of our parents. There was gonna be a major fight with them and other people; people who would judge us both on our decisions and as they would always judge us. I know how extremely difficult my parents could be, how they tried to make my mistakes for me. But they could not tell me to kill or burry what was ours. Your parents told you that you would have a difficult road ahead of you, that people would always judge you on this before anything else. Your parents could accept the facts. My parents refused to accept the facts. The facts that our mistake was worth more that what our futures had cost us. we knew what we were doing, what we had to do. We kept that with us for along time before we actually had to start to deal with these problems outside of our circle of people. When we had to deal with the public view of things, our views, and other's views that changed. Some of them had negative impact on almost everything. Other views just disappeared from our minds almost in an instance. The injustice and justice of and about what we were deciding to do. The public either felt sorry for me or thought I deserved what I got. What my parents did was totally uncalled for but they did it anyways. They had tried to force us apart but it wasn't going to work. We were too attached to each other. They didn't really understand how close we had grown to care for one another. They never would because they never had to go through this.
