You and I [Desami Fanfiction]

Chapter 14: The Whole Story

Asami

When I met Desna’s look, he had a smile on his face, but his eyes told so much more. They said what he wouldn’t. “Desna, you need to tell me,” I say.

The smile fades from his lips as he nods. “I know I do.”

“My father sent Eska and me to go after Korra. He said he needed her to open the Northern spirit portal. Eska agreed to it right away, but I was reluctant. Still, I went with her because I didn’t want to see her get hurt. We managed to find Korra in the middle of the ocean, heading to the Fire Nation,” he begins. I remember Mako saying something about Korra going on a trip. She must have been trying to get assistance from the Fire Nation. “When we found Korra…there was a fight, of course. You know Korra. Her and Eska never really got along.”

I look at Desna patiently, wondering where he was going. I was as lost as he seemed.

“While Korra and Eska were fighting, a spirit snuck up on them. Eska saw it coming but Korra… She tried to fight it but it got the better of her. When she had her guard down, it...,” Desna hesitates a moments, then says, “Pulled her underwater. We couldn’t find her after that, so we had to go back to my father.”

“You mean you don’t know what happened to Korra?” I ask in shock.

Something passes across Desna’s face, but I can’t quite tell what it is. Finally he shakes his head. “No.”

I let myself process this for a moment, taking in the situation. Korra could be lost under the ocean somewhere, or she could simply be at the Fire Nation already. She could be fighting off spirits somewhere, or she could already be on her way back. The uncertainty of it all is what scared me the most.

“Asami,” Desna said. Perhaps he could see the panic behind my eyes. I let him hold me as I pressed my head against is chest. I had always hated feeling helpless, not being able to do anything. It was a reoccurring feeling that I just couldn’t seem to shake.

I stayed in Desna’s arms for a while, tears slowly escaping my eyes.

“This is all my fault,” Desna whispers so quietly I don’t think he meant for me to hear it.

“Desna,” I whisper. “No, it’s not. Don’t you dare blame yourself.”

“I should have said no sooner,” Desna continues. “I should have told him he doesn’t control me.”

I look up at Desna, my eyes still wet with tears. What did he do?

Desna

Asami’s eyes were glittering, but I knew this was different than just her normal shine. They were only shining because of her tears, which I had caused. I wanted to wipe them all away, make these feelings go away. I felt a horrendous pit form in my stomach for two reasons. The first was this exact look on Asami’s face. The second was that I hadn’t told her the whole truth. I hadn’t told her the part about how I did know about Korra, about how I had watched her get killed by the spirit. I couldn’t bring myself to tell her in the end. I thought it would hurt her too much.

“I didn’t get to finish my story,” I tell her. “Do you want to hear it?”

She nods, and settles into my chest. Her hand grabs mine, telling me to continue talking. I swallow, reminding myself to be careful with her.

“We made it back to the South, where we found my father coming out of the spirit world. That was when I really found out just how much he wasn’t telling us. He was, of course, upset to hear that we hadn’t gotten Korra, but it was only for his own selfish reasons. I’m not totally sure why, but he needs the Northern portal open by a certain date. He refused to give us any details, and it’s been days since I’ve seen him.” I sigh, thinking of how detached my father was becoming. He was beginning to become obsessed with opening the portal, and he was closing himself off to the real world. “I’m not even sure he knows I left. But I just had to see you. It had been too long, and I just needed someone who understood.”

I feel Asami’s arm wrap around my waste. “I’ll always be here,” she tells me. I sigh in relief without even realizing it. Hearing her say made me feel like a weight was just lifted from my shoulders. If I didn’t have anything else, at least I had her. That was the one thing I was really afraid of losing.

Asami’s body kept me warm for a while. We stayed like that, her half hugging me, me holding her. Neither of us wanted to move, neither of us had a reason. It wasn’t until the apartment started to get dark that I realized what time it was.

“Asami,” I whisper to her, trying not to ruin the moment. For all I know, she could have already been asleep in my lap.

“Yeah?” she asks me, looking up. I can hardly see her now, but the green in her eyes still stands out. “What time is it?”

This question leads her to, to my dismay, stand up and turn on some lights. I flinch at the bright fluorescents of her apartment.

I hear Asami sigh from the other room. She comes back looking disappointed. “It’s getting pretty late. You should probably get going.”

“Right,” I say, just as a thought dawns on me. Where was I going to stay? I didn’t know where a hotel was, or if there even were any nearby. I didn’t want to be too far from Asami, not after being away from her for so long.

She seems to read my mind even from the other room. “Do you have somewhere to stay?”

I shrug. “Not exactly. But I passed plenty of empty benches on my way here.”

She laughs a little, making me smile. “You’re not sleeping on a bench. You can stay with me.”

I give her a bit of look, wondering if she realized what she just said. I was going to stay in her apartment with her?

Her face soon turns bright pink. “Oh, um, you know what I mean. I have a couch and everything. You can sleep there.”

I just laugh at her. “I’d love to stay here.”

She smiles at me. “Good.”