This pain | jjk + oc

{035}

[Minji's pov]

[Flashback]

I put my phone down next to me on the bed of which I'm sitting on. I look over my shoulder to see Jungkook writing lyrics. Classic, I think to myself. When Is he not doing something related to music? But I'm glad he's passionate about it. He's not passionate about many things, but singing, dancing, even just listening to music. It's his passion, it's what he lives for.

"What are you writing?" I say to my coffee eyed lover.

"It's a song about being a singer, it's trash, really.. I haven't really written it for bts, it's so far only the chores, and I can't write rap well.."

I grin at him. He never thinks his songs are good enough.

"Why don't you sing me some of it?"

He looks up at me. He doesn't want to sing it.. He isn't very confident in his singing nor writing, but we're working on that.

He takes a deep breathe, and starts singing the little bit of song he's written on his old, ruined paper that smells like old pencil shavings and marker, as he also draws with his copic markers.

"I'm a born singer, A little belated confession
(I swear)
The mirage that always seemed so far away is now before my eyes
(It's here)
I'm a born singer Perhaps an early confession 
But I'm so happy I'm good."

He looks up at me with rosy cheeks, and a sheepish smile.

"That's all I've got so far, it's short and theres not much to it. I could use Namjoon and Hoseok's help with the rapping parts, and maybe even Yoongi, if he's in the mood this weekend."

"It's so good! I like it a lot, it suits your voice." I give him a reassuring smile.

He returns a smile, but his is different, theres more light in his smile right now than there usually is. I'm not complaining, it looks great on him.

"Well something has you especially happy right now~" My words almost come off my tongue like music.

"I just love you a lot. I am very thankful for having such an amazing person in my life, and I know I don't deserve you. I'm just happy I have you. It makes me happy to wake up to you everyday."

I laugh at his heartfelt statement.

"You're too cheesy, kook." I move from my side of the bed over to Jungkook and rest my head on his leg, as he continues his writing.

"Jungkook?" I mumble.

"Hm?" he plays with my hair while he continues to come up with lyrics.

"Can you sing for me?"

He pauses and thinks of what to sing.

He decides to sing a song off the cuff and make up the words as he goes like we used to when we were bored in the practice room.

"I need you girl"

.+.+.+.+.+.+.

[Present day]

I look at the lifeless body on the gurney in room 107 on the second floor of the big scary hospital that I never imagined visiting Jungkook in.

I feel a small hand touch my shoulder, as if to comfort me.

"Min, he's okay." I hear his sweet soothing voice behind me.

"I'm worried for him. Now that I've seen him, I don't want to leave again. What if he had died? He would have never met Jeongsan. Dammit, he wouldn't even know he had a son. This is bull shit. Why did I think it was best to leave? Maybe now that Joon is older, we could move back here, but what would I tell Jungkook?! I can't just show up and expect everything to go back to normal!" I take a breath and collect my thoughts before speaking again.

"What do I do, Jimin?" I ask, but it sounds more like a plead.

"Stay here. Jungkook will understand that your heart was in the right place. You could move back here and raise Jeongsan with Jungkook like a real family. He could still be a singer in bts, now that Jeongsan is older, he wouldn't have to be here 24/7 like he would have wanted to when Jeongsan was younger. just explain yourself when he wakes up. He might think he died because his dead lover is in his hospital room, but he deserves to know you're alive, and this secret shouldn't last any longer."

He's right. Why couldn't I see sooner? Jungkook doesn't deserve what I've done to him. And if how I felt when Jimin called is how he felt when Jimin told him I died; I have caused him so much pain, and he doesn't deserve this pain.

"The nurse says he should be waking up in a little while, so I'm gonna leave you two alone for a little, and if you want, me and Namjoon can tell everyone about you being here, and explain to them so that when they see you, they won't get freaked out.

"Yes please. I appreciate it, Chim. Thanks."

"No problem. Do you want me to go get Jeongsan out of the daycare downstairs as well? I can take him back home with me if you want."

I shake my head,

"Yes please. Thank you, Jimin."

"Mhm, anything for you sis."

[Jimin's pov]

I walk out and close the door.

she's screwed

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Fun fact; "Jeongsan" is actually what Jungkook irl wants to name is future son.