Death Note x reader (guys x reader)

Shadow

Hello everybody! Happy sixty chapters! Guess who had to go to the hospital at one this morning? This girl! Heh, nothing to cool happened like last time, but at least I had more time to make this chapter, right? Anyway, I hope you all have a great day! Oh, and I think I'm going to upload chapters periodically on Mondays and Fridays from now on. And one last thing, all typos in this chapter are intentional. But, yeah, bye! 

Your P.O.V.

I'm writing this SUPER cool fan-fic about L and Light, and Yuki was reading it aloud in the middle of L's apartment.

"L was all like, 'Ohmehgerd, please let meh get in those hotpants, Ugami Yagami Light-san.' and Light said, 'Sorry, mey kokoro only beats for mai one true love, Jimin of One Direction.'", Yuki read, trying her hardest not to laugh.

Near had woken up and was "coincidentally" sitting right beside me so L couldn't. But hey, I'm the dense main character so I can only think about that so much. Oh, and Mello was sitting beside Yuki, laughing his ass off. And there sat L in the middle of it all, with this blank expression, a glossy, overcast and sorrowful look in his eyes.

It was priceless.

Yuki continued,"Light looked into L's bright, glowing black eyes and cried out,'I was juat kidding! Have meh babbies!'.  'Are you sure?!' L ejaculated.--Pfft, ha!" 

I was trying so hard not to laugh, but I was failing horribly. Near was smiling uncontrollably. L was still in shock. It looked like his hair fluffed up, as if he were a cat trying to defend itself. 

Alright, let me back up. L let me out of the prison-y place to go on our date. But he made the awful decision that I could bring my fanfiction and we stay at the apartment. With everyone still in it. And that was what we were doing, reading fanfiction, eating ice cream, and watching L get floofy.

"'Yes! We can have so many o dem babbies. Come on K!' L turned away from Ugami-San and looked at the slowly setting sun, as his eyes burst into flames. 'I an sorry, but my kokoro only doki doki's for the one person who truely understands me, Shadow the Hedgehog. He is just as edgy as I am.' And Shadow appeared and said, 'Welcome to the Black parade, mother fucker.' And he and L flew away on a gaint flying Matt. But L was pregan with Light's babby! How would Shadow feel? Lolz Idk read more to find out!"

"Oh my gosh, how were you able to make that masterpiece?" Mello choked out, barely able to form a real sentence. I flipped my hair sassily.

"I don't know, but I have one more story you might want to hear. It's called, "Goldie locks the mother-F*cking thug." I didn't want for anyone to respond, and began with the story.

"Once upon a time, there was a little girl named Goldie Lockes. She wasn't called this for her golden hair, no, it was because she made keys of gold to unlock people's houses while they were away and break their stuff. And if you ever called her little, she would break your legs. One day, a family of bears that owed Goldie a favor went out instead of doing what she asked. Because of that, she was thrown in jail for sixty days! When she got out, she waited for the bears to leave, and broke into their house. In the kitchen, there was some porage on the table. She tried the biggest bowl, but shouted, "Oh fuck dis hot." Then she tried the next, but it was to fucking cold and she poured it all on the floor. Then she tried the last bowl. It was just right. But then she remembered she hated the shitty oatmeal and smashed a chair to bits. After that, she took everything that she saw value in and loaded it into her awesome truck. She felt tired all of a sudden and went upstairs, making sure to knock every old painting down and tilt all the new ones. In the bedroom, she saw a big bed, medium bed, and little bed. She thought, "What kinda idiots buy three different beds when they could just use one? And why da hell does the baby sleep in here with em?" She jumped into the big one, but realized it was a giant stone slab. Next, she tried the the middle. The bed tried to eat her. She managed to escape the grip of the bed, and tried the last one. It was just right."

"Then she said, "Why the hell is the only good bed the baby's? What the fuck?" And she drove out of the bear's house with all their stuff and was never caught. The end." 

"Whoo! Best story ever!" Yuki laughed. Near shook his head.

"Nah, I think that one with Shadow and L was better."

"Everyone, get out of my house..." L whispered, still looking mortified. Everyone shrugged, but agreed and left.

"So....who wants to get some McDonald's? I'll pay." Yuki said, while we walked over to the elevator.  Oh. Em. Gee.

"Yuki, I will love you forever if you get McDonald's for me. You know I can't resist food." I replied, in all seriousness. Mello coughed, catching my attention.

"Uh, I think you mean MgRonalds? Never heard of a 'McDonald's'. There's one right near here." Huh? I can't help but think I know that from somewhere. Whatever. In a moment of pure advantage taking, I yelled out at the top of my lungs:

"DON'T YOU MEAN NEAR HERE!!"

There was a look of sheer disappointment on Near's face when I said that.