Life's Little Teardrops

3. Movin On

All that night it rained, at one point I think it was a storm. But it was hard to notice. All night I had my iPhone blaring pop songs while I mapped, wrote, and danced.

The next morning I packed my stuff.

It all took up 3 backpacks.

I packed most of my stuff from I had brought from home and some stuff I found, like:

8 hoodies

13 pairs of jeans

7 shirts

5 notebooks (including my used one)

3 packs of pens

4 packs of jerky

10 books

2 pairs of boots

And 1 pair of Black sunglasses as big as my head.

Ya, I packed some weird stuff but I was hoping to loot some houses on my way.

I had tried to find a way to carry most of it, but I ended up just looking like one of those amazon ants carrying a skyscraper.

I sat the packs on the desks in my bedroom class and walked outside with my notebook.

It was still cold from the day before and I seemed to be having second thoughts on leaving. I was safe here, I had no idea what was over those hills.

But this was so boring, sitting here with the same trees, rooms, books, words and worst of all silence.

I sat on the bench on the edge of the parking lot and looked over the dirty cars that littered the lot. Maybe one of them still had the keys in it, but even if they did, where would I go?

All my life I had just wanted to leave this town. That seemed so impossible now.

To leave or to stay? Either way I have to. I want to. I need to.

Staying was bleak, a sad one ending tail. But if I were to go, where would I sail.

On the waves of thoughts I crash and I cry myself a wave. For now I'm not brave, I am weak.

For my future is too bleak to voyage past the trees.

To stay or to leave?

The words sounded wrong but I knew writing was good. Putting the words together meant there were some good ones.

I folded up the journal and sat it on the bench tapping the black leather cover.

There were about 7 cars which were all of decent quality but one stood out.

A black Volvo with a pink star on the back window.

I walked over to it and peeked in the window. The interior was leather all the way through with a child's car seat in the back. I couldn't see the keys so I tried the handle, which required some tugging but eventually opened.

It smelled stale, like opening a Tupperware container of 6 month old crackers. I sat in the seat and looked in the passenger seat. A small stack of Books and a purse sat happy to be found.

The purse was purple and lace, it also seemed to contain nothing but Gum, 10 dollar bills, and an iPad.

I took out the iPad and attempted to turn it on. I searched the console for a charger and eventually found a wound up cord. The books tilted over a little and collapsed over the seat, I plugged the iPad in and picked them up.

It was made of a few little kid books, an Autobiography of Jackie Kennedy, and a book titled 'Medical Moments in History and How They Should have Been Fixed'.

I had never been very interested in medicine but due to the circumstances, I thought it was worth a look.

I opened it to the first page when I saw a Pink Post-it note handing out of the top. It had scribbles all over it and appeared to be a shopping list for Raley's Groceries. That might be a good place to go, I mean there'd be food and other people had probably gone there.

I stuck the note on the dashboard and opened the book to page 169.

Deedee would have laughed. Trin would have told me to look in the index for 'Infection'.

It was highlighted:

In times of death and crisis, hope for better than a cure.

Whoever wrote that book didn't seem very professional. I put it down marking the page with the Post-it and returned to my hunt for the keys.

I looked under the floor mat and in the purse pocket but couldn't find them. I thought of what Bailey would do, she was always finding lost things. She'd look in the glove compartment.

Where I found the keychain attached to a small penguin.

I turned the keys in the ignition and it started. I thought of how I accidentally started my mom's while looking for my iPhone. I looked at the wheel and and the lever in the console which showed the car was in park. I put it in drive and drove toward the class, almost crashing into the wall.

After loading the bags in the backseat I tossed in a few beanbags to sleep on.

I opened the driver's side door and sat my notebook on the passenger side seat next to the purse and books.

I looked back at the school where I had spent most of my life (so far), and thought of everything that happened here. All of the witty insults and dirty analogies.

Every moment I treasured.

I would forget it, for sure. So I needed something from it.

I searched the parking lot and lawn for anything I could take. something small but not small enough to get lost.

I got in the car and pulled over to the out building by the entry gates. There sat our school's message board. It read

H ve a gr at sum er!

In bolded letter cards. I got out of the car and looked at the letters, selecting one.

An E for Eliza. I hadn't heard that name in years, there was no one to call my name anymore.

I took the thick piece if yellow and black plastic and sat it with the notebook.

Now I knew I would remember it, it needed to remember me.

I looked through the purse for a sharpie and in the place where the E had stood I wrote

Ellie was Here!

In tiny writing so it would fit in the square. As I capped the marker I looked at the Flag.

I could only think of one gesture for it.

I lifted my right hand above my head , my middle, Ring, and index finger to the sky with my pinkie and thumb touching.

I could never really whistle so I hummed. "Doo Do Do Doom."

I lowered my hand and got in the car.