When Past Becomes Present (an Alex Turner fan fic)

Chapter 10

AN: Please continue rating and commenting. x

*Lillia’s POV*

His voice transferred smoothly from singing to his rough voice again. “Uh, this next song is quite personal. It’s called Do Me a Favour.” Personal meant sad, I knew that. I didn’t want sad though, I wanted a happy memory. Nevertheless, I was ready to hear whatever Alex’s song had to say, whatever story our past wanted to tell us tonight.

*Alex’s POV*

I don’t know if I can do it. This song has too much of me in it, too much of us. I let my voice trail out anyways, beginning the first line as the music started. “Well, the morning was complete. There were tears on the steering wheel dripping on the seat.” I almost couldn’t bear to think of it. Our last day.

I had flown with her to Scotland, and we were driving to her university. I was destined to go back to Sheffield, to stay with the band, to make my fame. She needed her education; she wanted to make something of herself.

“You can’t keep her back from her life.” I told myself as I drove. There were already tears dripping from both of our eyes, but we said nothing. I had to ask though, I just had to. “So, any parties down there, yet?” I just wanted to know if she would be meeting anyone new soon. “How should I know? I don’t even know anyone there yet.” She had a point, but I couldn’t stop. I questioned her on everything about his new place, this new threat to me. After a while I could tell she was annoyed, but I continued. I just had to know. “Do me a favour, and stop asking questions!” I yelled it in to the mic just like she had that day.

*Lillia’s POV*

Hearing those words again, the ones that had come out of my own mouth, sent a pang of guilt through my body. I had been harsh with him; I didn’t know what else to do. I was angry. He was the one who suggested we break up since I was going to college. I never really wanted that. I figured it was for the best though, and I agreed. I should have just told him that I didn’t want to, that he was the only one, that I didn’t want anyone else, but I didn’t.

So, as we drove up the bend, I yelled at him. I couldn’t bear to hear any more questions. He was obviously trying to figure out if I would forget about him, and I knew the answer. I didn’t want to think about the parties I might go to. I didn’t want to think of seeing other boys but only thinking of him. I didn’t want to accidentally let any sentiments slip out. I needed to stay strong; I couldn’t falter.

*Alex’s POV*

She exited the car with the last of her things. I couldn’t watch this. I couldn’t do this, but I did. We looked at each other once more, and as I stared in to her blood shot eyes, the green of them glowing sea green, I knew I had made a mistake. She was so beautiful, and I couldn’t bear to see her so upset, so defeated. She was trying to look strong, just like always, but she didn’t. She looked weak and tired like she’d simply given up.

She turned away. I watched as she walked up the drive to her dorm, struggling to carry the boxes. As I watched her become farther and farther away I felt stuck.  I couldn’t let her go. I couldn’t do it. I kept thinking how stupid I was, how I had to go get her back. Then, I was running. I ran right up to her with every intention of taking her back. I would tell her we could stay together, that we could make it work. I grabbed her arm, and she jolted around. I stuttered, trying to find words. They weren’t coming; I was too afraid. “Do you need help?” It was all I could manage. I saw the hope fade quickly from her face, anger replacing it. “Ugh, stop flattering yourself!” She jerked her arm away and continued walking. I could see the tears as her head turned, and I knew she was crying. I was too. I had just let my everything go.

*Lillia’s POV*

He hadn’t fought for me. I wanted him to tell me it would be okay, that we could get through the distance. As I walked away from him, the tears streaming down my face, I thought maybe we couldn’t. Maybe the distance would be too much. I knew I had to let him go. I glanced behind me to see him waving from his car, tears on his face too. We were done.