We accept the love we think we deserve

Chapter 11

Noa's POV

I tried to act like I didn't hear him. I looked around me and no one else was in the street other than us. I heard his heavy footsteps behind me. I started to walk faster. My legs trying to find a busier place. They weren't fast enough. A rough hand grabbed my arm and yanked me back. He turned me around and I saw him. For the first time in three months. Three months isn't exactly a long time but it felt like three years. I looked up into his ice cold, blue eyes. I normally loved blue eyes, but his weren't the kind of eyes you could get lost in. He grinned down at me. The curve of his lips held a sinister edge, evoking a chill across the surface of my skin in goose bumps.

"Hello love. Long time, no see."

A chill was send down my spine as I melt away under his piercing blue eyes. His grip tightened around my upper arm as I tried to get free very careful, trying to make him stay calm. I know it doesn't look like he's calm now, but you don't know how he is when anger pushes him over the edge.

"Do you still remember me?"

"Yes. I do remember you, Joey."

"I figured. How can you forget me? You can't. Right?"

His dark chuckle disgusted me. He ruffled his free hand through his black, short hair. Finally, he let go of my arm. I rubbed my hand over the area he basically just crushed in his hand.

"How are you and Jason doing?"

"Good. I guess.." Shit. Why did you say that?

"Why so unsure?" He prodded. He took a step closer to me and I backed away more.

"No. I'm not unsure. Of course not." I rambled.

He looked around, probably making sure nobody was in the street as he grabbed my arm again and leaned in. His lips close to my ear.

"Listen to me, love ."

I teared up. My vision became blurred as he moved on.

"If you ever tell somebody else what happened in the past, you are in deep trouble. It's not really that smart to leave Jason either. You know way to much. We can't let you go."

He let go of me and backed up a bit, giving me space to breathe properly. But I couldn't. I was frozen.

"Have a nice day, love."

He smirked evil once again before turning around and walking off. I watched him as he walked around the corner and out of my vision. When he was gone, I let out a heavy sigh that was caught in my throat for the past minute or so. I felt so... Broken. Like, all my strength slipped away. My anxiety came back. It was the worst feeling in the whole world. I need to get out of here. I need to be safe. I need to feel safe. My feet followed my mind. They carried me home. I ran and ran. My heart was racing and my head pounding.

'We can't let you go...'

The words kept replaying in my head. I ran faster. Afraid of him. The only safe place was my home.

I reached my house and got my keys out of my purse. My hands trembled as I tried to find the right key. As I found it, I opened the door as quick as possible. I slammed it closed behind me and pushed my coat off my shoulders. I ran up the stairs. My mind wouldn't stop replaying everything. The past. His words. Everything. And... My mind remembered the time that... No! No no no! Don't think about that. You will lose it again! Don't! I took off all my clothes as I walked into the bathroom. I turned the shower to a decent temperature and got under the warm water. I sat down and curled into a ball. My head laying on my knees as I softly began to sob. The little droplets ran over my soft skin. Memories flooded back into my already messed up mind. The past wouldn't stop chasing me. And I was the only one who knew about it. I needed to fight it on my own. And it's hard. Really hard. I felt so numb. Numb. Lifeless. Empty. No one could hear me. No one was here for me. Everyone is gone. No one knows about all of the horrible memories. Most of the people can move on. But I can't get it out of my mind.

I covered my ears and tried to scream as hard as I could. But it came out like a faint whisper. The lump in my throat was to big to call for someone. I needed some one who I could share all these things with. I had one... A long time ago...

To be continued...