In Love With My Mobster Best Friend (mxmxm)

TEN: EXPOSE

Media: You and Me – Lifehouse

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Coe's POV

I laid on my bed, staring out of the skylight above me. The clouds were greyish in contrast to the bright blue sky: a beautiful sight. If only I could appreciate it today. I sighed. Watching the cloud roll lazily by above me has always been calming, but at the moment, it was doing nothing for me.

Hours had passed after the confrontation I had with Jared. Hours that I had spent wide awake in my own room, afraid to venture out in case I walk out of my room to realise that I had dreamt the whole thing up. A whole night has passed and still my mind was whirring with excitement despite my obvious need for some sleep.

The inside of my chest itched and I wiggled my nose, wondering if it was possible to cut a hole in my ribs so I could scratch at it. Anxiety was hitting me hard and I could think of nothing that I could do to calm myself down.

Who could blame me for feeling like that, really? Finally, after eight whole years of trying to find the right time to confront my best friend about his lifestyle, I did it. I told him that I knew about him being a mobster. Best part of it all, it wasn't disastrous. He didn't put a bullet to my head, or got his right hand man to silence me. I was still alive and breathing, and grinning like a fool right now.

He held onto me. He actually, literally, held on to me. He didn't let me walk out. He told me I was permanent.

What does that even mean?

I let out a giggle. I'm not sure, but I like the sound of it. The smile on my face wouldn't go away.

Damn it.

I rolled on my side and stared at my favourite and only picture on my side table for the umpteenth time. I think I could muster a much more blissful smile right now. I can't remember the last time that the both of us took a picture together. Maybe we should take one soon. Was it weird? Two best friends taking a photo together? It shouldn't be. Not when Jared was so used to being photographed for the media.

I exhaled, feeling myself sink into my bed. My life felt a lot more complete in just one night. It was almost completely perfect. Now, if only I could just tell Jared how I truly felt about him, and for him to accept me. Then my life would be truly perfect. I could die without regrets then.

A knock on my door rang out, and I literally jumped up in my bed to a sitting position. My head spun slightly from the sudden movement and I closed my eyes to right myself, "Come in." I managed softly despite feeling like I was going to throw up.

The door clicked open rather gently revealing Heath, who stood at the door, smiling at me politely, "Good morning. Jared told me to wake you." He said, and I bit my lips awkwardly. Heath never came to get me in the mornings. Jared was always the one that did it.

I recalled briefly last night when I suggested to Jared to let me leave and have Heath move in and take my place. Was this it? Was Jared taking my suggestion seriously? I gulped at the sharp squeeze in my chest.

Before I could ask why Jared even needed to wake me up in the first place, the devil himself walked into my room beside Heath, dressed impeccably from head to toe with a blinding, charming smile on his face. Even with my conflicted emotions, I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face like a giant fool. My morning was going incredibly well despite my lack of sleep and Heath's uninvited intrusion into my room.

"I see you're not ready." Jared leaned against the door frame, "Get your ass in the shower please."

The way he said 'ass' was making my stomach tighten and I licked my lips. I scratched at the back of my head with a confused look, "Ready for what?" I swung my legs off my bed and turned around to make my bed.