Here is the first chapter. Feel free to comment thoughts and wishes.
Hope you like it. Bye.
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I felt so exhausted, after we destroyed ALIE and walked back to camp. The memories and the pain came back, while we were starting into a safer future now.
Did I mentioned how horrible coming back was? Losses and post-traumatic stress disorder left their scars on all of us. But this wasn’t the worst thing for me.
The gazes from „my people" were the most horrible thing that I had to face after everyone was back in the safe walls of Arkadia.
I stepped through the open gate and I felt all their eyes on me. I saw their accusation and their judgement. I glanced up to Bellamy who I was walking next to and saw the uncertainty and doubt on his face.
I never felt so small. Maybe we both never felt this small. Not even after we landed on earth. Stay strong, I said to myself, not believing my own words.
“Let’s go and find our friends.” Bellamy leaded me to the front door of the crashed Ark. I took a deep breath and followed him inside. It took a moment to get used to the low lighting in this room.
When my eyes got used to the light, I saw our friend walking towards us. Bellamy was hugging Raven and Harper and Monty simply nodded in my direction. He was holding Harper close. Jasper turned away, he didn’t even look at me.
The only person who seemed happy, to see me, was Raven.
“Hey, Clarke, are you okay?”, asked Raven after she pulled me into her arms.
“Mostly”, I answered. I shrugg my shoulders, so she pulled an eyebrow upwards, clearly not believing me. But with a weak smile of me Raven let go of it.
“You both must be so exhausted. I will get you a room to freshen up and get some rest.” Raven disappeared for a view moments.
“And you and Harper?”, asked Bellamy, what he just found out. Monty nodded pulling Harper even closer. “I am happy, you both are happy”, Bellamy added. I smiled softly and nodded. I wanted them to be as happy as I was with Lexa.
The memories broke over me and left me burned out and even more exhausted. I tried to smile again but my legs couldn’t handle my weight anymore and I crashed to the floor. I was sure that I would hit my head badly, but before it could hit the ground, there were two big hands to catch me. I blacked out in his arms and drifted into a peaceful and dreamless sleep.
As I woke up I heard nothing but silence. I slowly opened my eyes and smiled slightly. It felt so good to be all alone with nothing but darkness. I could push away the weight of what I did in the past months and feel a little bit relieve.
After a couple of minutes I started to feel my dry throat. I set myself up in the warm sheets of the bed, then I swung my legs out of bed and my feet touched the cold ground. I forgot about my thirst.
I was wearing nothing but my underwear. Who undressed me? My mom? Bellamy? I felt my cheeks turn red and hot. I pulled the sheets around my body and got up, feeling a little dizzy. I slowly sneaked though the room towards the door. It made a squeaking noise as I opened it a little bit and listened through the small gap.
I heard two voices talking about me. “How is she doing?”, asked an unmistakable voice. “She is still very weak, Bellamy. The past months were to much.” My mom told him.
“Can I go to her? Just sit next to her for some minutes?” His voice cracked, while he was asking that like a little boy afraid of something. “Bellamy, I know that you and Clarke are very close friends, but you need to give her some time to handle everyth...”
The door swung open and I saw the ground coming closer. As I hit my head a big pain stroke through me and I passed out right before Bellamy or my Mom could get to me.
