why

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Why do I enjoy this? I hate the fact that I enjoy this. I've tried writing things down before but it just turns into "I'm sad and lonely waaahh" but this is just different? Like I hate writing with a burning passion and I always have. I promised myself that I'd never be that one loser who wrote feelings down and now I am. Ew. I guess this isn't really feelings though, it's just thoughts? I don't know maybe that's why I don't hate this. I really wanted to hate this. I sort of like this. This sucks. Dammit.

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