Your Skin Taste of Sin (Ryan Sitkowski)

Rare Symptoms

Silence.  My worst enemy and best friend.
It's driving me mad. I've been consumed by silence.

I got home from the forest around 2 a.m. for some much needed sleep. But apparently that's too much to ask for. I've been staring at my ceiling since I got in bed. I was super tired and completely drained, but no matter what I couldn't go to sleep.

It's already 8 a.m. And I have done nothing but lay in my bed as silence slowly drove me insane. Every time I close my eyes I lost my sense to sleep. But as my eyes stayed open, sleep was the only thing on my mind.

I groaned at the thought that today we were recording a new song. Ughhhh I just want to lay in bed. I have to go, so I finally got my asads out of bed and dragged myself to the bathroom. Maybe a shower will make me feel better. I turned the water in the shower on and stripped away from my clothes.

I stepped into the shower as I felt the cold water down my back. After a few minutes I turned the water off and dried myself off with a red towel. As I walked back to my room, I didn't feel better just felt numb once again. What the fucks name is wrong with me?

I dressed myself with a Worn Doll shirt and black sweatpants. Once I was dressed I went back to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. After I was done,  I looked at myself in the mirror. I had bags under my eyes.  Ryan you look like shit,  well I feel like shit.

I grabbed my beanie from my room before I headed downstairs and walked into my kitchen. Yike, the pure thought of food made me feel sick right now. There is something seriously wrong with me if I'm not hungry.

Anyways, it's already 8:45 a.m. I should be going. I grabbed my keys off the counter and walked out my apartment door. And I made sure I locked my door as well before I walked to my car. I unlocked my car climbed in it and drove off to the studio.

The drive to the studio wasn't that far, so in a few minutes I was already there. I parked my car and saw Balz's car pulling up next to mine. We both got out of our cars at the same time. "Hi Ryan can I talk to you about last night?" he as we walked to the front door of the studio.  

"Sure." "I'm sorry about freaking out like that. But you have to understand that I told you not be a dick to her and you do exactly that-" "Balz, I understand. I stepped way over the boundary. I'm sorry fucking shit up all the time and if it makes you feel better I decided it would be best staying away from Autumn," as much as I hate to say it, it needed to be said.

Before I left the forest yesterday, I made the choice to stay away from Autumn. I couldn't be an ass to her, and knowing me, it was only bound to happen. Maybe I wasn't made for love.

Balz stood there, dumbfounded by my words. I just shrugged my shoulders and headed inside. Brandon and Chris were already there. I sat down next to Brandon after I got my guitar from the corner of the room. Soon enough Ricky, Balz and Ghost walked in.

*Time Lapse*

"Balz can you do that last part over just one more time, it sounds like it's messing something, "Chris said to Balz. That's a good thing about Chris, he always pushes us to do better. I respect him for that, but right now, I was want to be home laying in bed, hoping that I could go to sleep.

We've been here for over two hours now. After everyone arrived and told me I look like shit, we started recording. We were almost done for the day. Thank Satan. After Balz redid the part, we all waited for Chris to talk about Kylie's attack. We all sat around the couch as Chris began to speak.

"I spoke to the leader of the Ensien race, he said that one of his kind was attacked as well. We made a plan to protect our kind and to update each other about the attacks. Now, enough with hunters,  let's go to Sheetz!!" Chria exclaimed, followed by the guys cheering.

Again the thought of food made me sick. "You guys go without me," I told them. They all looked shocked. "Ryan, what's going on. You're not hungry, I'm pretty sure you haven't eaten anything since yesterday and you look like you haven't slept in years," Ricky said. "Since when did this all start? " Balz asked.

"I don't know yesterday, last night, something like that," I said nonchalantly. "Was this after you spoke to Autumn and decided to stay away from her ? " Balz asked. "Why does it matter?" I asked not seeing the importance of the time and when it happened. "Yes," they all said in sync. I rolled my eyes and said yes that it was after I spoke to her.

"Ryan don't you get it? " Ghost said. What the fuck are they talking about.  "Its all symptoms a vampire gets when they reject their mates," Chris said.

Ohhhhhh.....wait.....mate?.......Autumn's my mate?.............