Gasoline-- Tronnor AU

Chapter 36- Troye

Wake Up -EDEN

I stepped into the shower, avoiding all the mirrors, hoping to wash my mistakes away. It didn't happen. The cuts and bruises on my body stung from the pressure of the steaming hot water. I tried to focus on the sound of the water dropping onto the tile floor, but all I could hear was Jacob's voice yelling at me. I tried to think about the droplets rolling down my skin, but all I felt was unwanted hands roaming my body.

I didn't even realize I was crying until I turned the tap off. I resisted the urge to scream and shuffled back into my room. I picked up my backpack that lay empty on the floor. School isn't even important to me anymore.

I picked up my phone and scrolled through all my social media looking for something that'll take my mind off everything that's wrong. But, what I found was the exact opposite.

"I'll never let go."

It was graffiti art of two hands. One red and one blue. Paint dripped from both of them making a mess of purple underneath them.

Fuck you Connor Franta.

He really isn't making it easy for me to get over him. I read the caption over and over again in my head. Eventually, he has to let go, because I'm not coming back. As much as I want to, it's too late. Jacob won't let me leave.  He'll hurt Connor if I do.

I scrolled past the picture without another glance.

***

Downstairs, my mother looked at me with a concerned face.

"Tok, are you sure you're okay?" Mum asked.

"Yes Mum," I said trying to sound convincing.

"You look like you haven't slept in days. Have you eaten at all?"

"I-" I shook my head sadly. I haven't eaten anything since Saturday night. That was two days ago.

"Tokky, you're going to mess yourself up again. What's going on?"

I sat down at the bar stools, ready to talk for once.

"I broke up with Connor, Mum."

She looked surprised but didn't respond. Instead she reached out to touch my shoulder. I pulled away.

"I miss him. It was the biggest mistake I've ever made. I want him back," I said softly.

"Then get him back Troye," she said. "I doubt Connor has moved on that easily."

"I can't Mum. I- It's too late." I'm not going to explain my relationship with Jacob to her. I don't care what she says, she's never gonna know about that.

"It's never too late Tok. You can always fix your mistakes. Always."

I kept her words in my head as I walked across campus to Tyler, who hasn't been himself around me since I broke up with Connor.

"Hey, Tilly," I said softly, hoping for some comfort from my best friend.

"Oh, hey Troye," he said. "Listen I have to meet someone, but I'll talk to you later, kay?"

"Tyler, please don't leave. I really need someone to talk to," I said honestly.

He stopped and looked at me. Like really looked at me.

"Are you okay?" he asked.

I shook my head, tears streaming down my face.

"Hey, shh," Tyler hushed, gathering me into his arms. "Talk to me."

"I can't!" I cried into his shirt, shaking my head.

He pulled away tilting my chin up so I was forced to look at him.

"Troye, what's going on?" he asked, his voice laced with concern and fear.

"I'm not supposed to talk about it," I said, realizing talking to Tyler was a mistake. I started to slip away from his arms but he held on to me.

"Ouch!" I yelled when his hand gripped onto one of the bruises on my arm.

"Troye...?" he said my name softly.

"He hurts me," I whispered.

Tyler eyes widened. "That bitch!"

"Shush Tyler! You can't say anything, he's-"

"Of course I'm gonna say something!! This isn't ok Troye! He can't-"

I shook my head frantically. "No! You can't. He's gonna, he said-"

"Did he threaten you?" Tyler asked.

I nodded.

"Ok, calm down," he said gently. "Listen, I won't say anything. But only until we figure out what to do. Is that okay? Just stay away from him for a while."

"I can't. If I don't listen to him, he makes it hurt more." I shivered thinking about what might happened if he finds out I told someone.

Tyler thought for a while before responding. "Ok, you're gonna stay with me today. Do you have any classes with him?"

I shook my head thankfully.

"OK stay with me. We can hang out at my place after school, okay?"

I hesitated before nodding.

Tyler walked me to my first class. We were already late.

I stopped him before he left. "Don't tell Connor."

"I wasn't going to," he said. "He's depressed enough already, this will only overwhelm him more. But I am gonna talk to Zoe. Is that okay?"

I nodded again. I trust Zoe.

I walked into my first period and everyone looked up at me from their work. Some of them whispered to their friends as I awkwardly shuffled to my seat in the back.

Everyone had their own ideas of what happened with me and Connor. The most popular one was that I started doing drugs again and Connor broke up with me. People have started called me a slut for moving on so quickly.

Mr. Green went back to his lecture as soon as I sat down. I zoned out as soon as he opened his mouth. My mind wandered back to Connor. Forgetting him might be the hardest thing ever. Maybe even impossible...

~V

hey guys I'm so sorryyyy I completely forgot abt this story!! just wrote something up real quick for you all :)