ever since » e.d

t h i r t y - o n e

malia

"Hurry!" I laughed as he made his way to the car. He got all the food from the shop just incase we got hungry. I started driving as he sat in the car. He smiled as I drove. 

"So San Fran?" I asked and he nodded. "I'm so excited!" He said and I nodded agreeing.

His hand was on my thigh. It was distracting, it sent shivers all over. 

"Go away!" I chuckled brushing his hands away. He cranked the volume louder on the radio as a new song was playing.

"Hey this song is pretty good!" Ethan said listening to it. 

"I guess." I laughed nodding until I heard the chorus. 

"OH HELL NAW!" I screamed changing the song. 

"HEY! It was a good song!" Ethan whined and changed it back. 

"No it's not" I quickly said. 

"Do you even know who's it by?" Ethan asked. "In fact I do." I said. "Who?" Ethan asked smirking.

"Shawn and I." I replied and sighed. 

"It is?" He asked. "Go search it if you want, it was a song we made ages ago." I said. I grabbed his phone and typed away. 

"You didn't tell me." He said. "It's not important." I breathed out and changed the channel. "But you have a cute voice!" He said making me smile immediately.

"Six hours drive." I groaned. 

"It's okay, I'm here. I'll make sure you're not bored." He smiled.

"Make sure you do it without killing both of us."

+

four hours later

I continued to drive as Ethan slept being the little sleepy head he was. His soft snores filling my ears. I don't blame him, my eyes are going to shut soon as well. The sun was setting as I continued down the road until I felt a jolt beside me. Ethan shot up from his seat.

He turned towards me, his face was more swollen than usual. 

"You alright?" I asked focusing back on the road.

"I want to change." He said blankly, that was all he said.

"What do you mean?" I asked turning around and seeing the yellow and orange horizon.

"I've realised I treated you like shit, I've told you to die, I pushed you away, I made you cry..." He said tearing up. 

"I've been like this for a while now and I hate it, I hate myself for doing this. I'm just fed up"

I looked at him confused as the soft wind brushes against my skin through the windows, making me hair fly softly.

"Fed up of being compared. I only did this out of jealousy. You know how it feels like to be compared to your twin brother? He's always been the centre of attention. 

He gets good grades and can easily make my family proud, he does it without even trying and I'm always left out. I try to make them proud, to make them think differently of me but whenever I do get something good, they would always turn the situation to me lying or making it up. It's stressful, it hurts. 

He can easily take anything away from me, any girl. He can make everyone think good of him, grades, schooling and personality wise. Coaches, teachers, parents, friends and even family, they all crowd around him, congratulating him. Even if he does the smallest things.