Left Behind

Chapter 8

What is wrong with my eyes? Why is everything so distorted? Nothing looks real. I keep closing my eyes and opening them, but nothing has changed. This isn't right. This is not how eyes work. I think. Maybe... the window is blurry.

I wonder what time it is.
Where is the clock...
the numbers are blurry. That's okay.
The room is dark...
it's always dark. I could sleep, but what will that help?

I'm not tired.
I am tired.

I've slept a lot. My mind feels heavy. Am I in water? This whole room is full of water. It's warm and it's dark. I'm comfortable.

I'm scared.
It's too dark. I don't know what's here. I might not be alone.

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhh
Don't speak.

See? There's no one. I'm alone.

Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.
Alone.

I should clean the hot springs tomorrow.
       I think dad will appreciate it if I do
    it for him.
I'll help mom cook dinner too. It'll be nice. My family is nice.

What should I wear to onee-chans
               wedding? Her fiancé is kind.

What about my wedding? I wonder what if we should do a theme?
Maybe white and blue? A theme would be nice. What if I had it decorated with snowflakes? Would Viktor like that?

Where's my wedding?

Where's my family?

Where's my home?

These sheets are soft. I could just fall right asleep.
Or wait... am I asleep? No I'm awake.

It's morning
It's night.

Makkachin needs to be fed. I've been feeding him for you.
I've been cleaning the resort too. It's ready for you to come home too... Viktor.

Screw him.
Screw him screw him screw him screw him screw him screw him screw him screw him screw him.

Too many thoughts.

No no no no no no no no no no no no

This isn't real. None of this is real. If it ends now, I'll just start over. Start over from scratch.

Yes.

None of this is real. My surroundings, my memories... me... I'm not real. So it's okay... if I go?

Where's Makkachin?
He's a good dog.

My neck is cold.
The necklace is cold. The rings are
cold.
Cold.

Why is it so cold.

So cold.

It's freezing.

I'm going to freeze.

I'm going to die.

Help.

Help me.

Please.

I'm going to die.

Help.

Help.

Please...

"Yuuri?.."