Burn (Part 2 Of Caffeine)

Chapter 22

Kyuhyuns POV

I sat on my bed, thinking about everything that has happened.

Why am I such an ass? I probably lost the love of my life, and my child.

I fell back, letting my head hit the soft pillows. The past two days felt like ten years ago, not being able to sleep nor being able to see Sungmin since he's pissed.

Wow, all of these familiar things happening at once. Can I just forget him? No I can't do that. I demanded myself that I won't brake our promise.

I stood up and went to the living room. I was in the mood to read. Next to the TV was a bookshelf that I haven't dusted in a long time. I grabbed a book and sat on the couch.

'I don't know my feelings. I like Sungmin, a lot, but he probably doesn't like me. He obviously knows I exists since we walk to the bus stop together. We have never talked but he's so cute. I just want to talk to him. Mom said that it's wrong to like guys, that I should only look at girls. I can't help but look at Sungmin though, I guess I have a thing for older men. I want to tell him my heart.

Why is he making my heart like this? He makes me angry for no reason. I want to confess so much but we don't talk so it'd be weird. Since he's older, should I change the way I am? Should I be more bad? Maybe he'd like it if I were bad? Why is this one guy make my stomach do flips? I'm so frustrated with him. Should I be how I am normally? Aish, really, this guy makes me so flustered for no reason.'

I stared at the page I just read.

What is this?

I looked at the cover. 'Cho Kyuhyun, age: 15'

I even liked Sungmin as a teenager. About eighteen years. I stared at the ceiling, thinking about my high school years. I closed my eyes and thought long and hard.

I walked out of my house fast, I didn't want to miss the opportunity to walk with Sungmin. It was my first year of middle school. He was two years older than me but it was fine. He would never bother me. We rarely talked.I exited the house and saw Sungmin leaving. I followed him.

"Hi, hyung." I said shyly. He smiled and we continued walking to the bus together.

I'm pathetic, I can't even keep a conversation.

We sat on the bus together everyday. We never talked, there was always silence.

By the third month, I was still mute around him. I couldn't help but stare at him, he really was something. Sometimes I'd see him outside of class and his smile was so adorable. Seeing him would make me distracted. Sometimes I'd catch his eye and I would be red during class. It was embarrassing. I knew that this was just a crush that would soon pass.

I was wrong, the crush never passed. I liked him from when I started middle school until I ended high school. That's just how sad I am, I never once talked to him. By my second year of high school, he already graduated but he still would walk with me to the bus stop. Those were the times he'd talk to me about bullying. I then later learned that he didn't in fact graduate high school, but he was held back for a year. I wanted to be cool at the time so I started bullying people. I had the opportunity with this kid, Lee Hyukjae. By my last year of high school, it was Sungmins last year too. When we came home, he would always have bruises of some sort. It pained me seeing him in pain but he still smiled.

I eyes shot open and I looked around the room.

What the fuck just happened? Was that all a memory? From middle school to the end of high school, I just saw it all.

I sighed in frustration to where I was going with this. I liked Sungmin for exactly nineteen years now that I remember when I started to like him. I was a completely different person back then. I was an actual gentleman. I wasn't the ass I was today. What happened to me? I walked over to the shelf and looked through the books. I wanted to know how I was before I bullied people, what I thought, and everything else. Maybe this is the key to getting back into Sungmins heart. I pulled a book that was from when I was fourteen, back when I first liked him, perfect. I opened the book.

-----------------------------------------------------A/N: So, from my calculations:

When they talked, Kyuhyun was 22

Year: 2010

Kyu started liking Sungmin at 14

So he has liked Sungmin for 8 years already.

They got married two years later

Year: 2012

Age: 24 (Kyuhyun) 26 (Sungmin)

(Sun Hi was 3 already)

At the start of this story.

Year: 2014

Kyuhyun: 26 Sungmin: 28

Now

Year: 2019

Kyuhyun: 31 Sungmin: 33

I'm hoping my math is right. If you were confused, here's some help.