Rupture

Chapter 10

I can't stop thinking about Xavier.

Even though he told me outright that he was against what the government required and was from some area that wasn't anything like this.

Along with all of the other confusing things, I couldn't see why he would be here instead of wherever he came from.

I mean, not that I want him to leave...

I shake my head. Ever since I met him my life has been more complicated than ever.

"Angel?"

I look over and see Rosie. She's grinning ear to ear.

"Hmm?" I ask, distracted.

"I don't have to go to the doctor's tomorrow! It was rescheduled, apparently the place is filled up," She says, beaming now.

I know how restless she's been so that's good. I smile and nod. "Good. Remember you still have to go eventually," I warn.

"Not for awhile!" She singsongs, skipping out of the room. 

I follow her downstairs, ready for lunch.

As soon as I look up Edith is standing right there in front of me, staring at me as if waiting for me.

"Angelica. Do you know anything about Brynne?" 

I'm surprised she brought her up, she doesn't much approve of Brynne.

"No," I say, cautiously.

"Good. I was hoping you weren't involved," she gives me a sick smile.

"What...?"

"I reported her."

"WHAT?!" I ask, my world spinning. "WHAT FOR?"

Edith's eyes turn hard, cold. "I saw Brynne with a boy. They were...kissing," She scowls as she says it, as if thats the highest offense on her list.

"I don't believe you," I choke, coughing the words out. 

Suddenly, I start to wonder...that wasn't Xavier, was it? I don't know why, but this thought rises up something inside of me, making me want to grit my teeth and sream.

"What...what did the boy look like?" As soon as I say it I can't believe myself, how could I be so selfish when I just found out my best friend was just reported by my own cousin?! Still, I need to know.

Her eyes pierce me. "Why would you care? Well, he had blonde hair, if you must know."

I exhale a sigh in relief. At the same time I want to hit myself for being relived that my best friend and Xavier weren't cheating together when Brynne's probably being interrogated.

"When-when did you report her?" I squeak, my voice small.

"Last night."

Interrogation is over by now then. She's probably in a confinemnet cell, waiting to be treated or thrown in jail...

I suddenly have the urge to throw up.

Instead I sream.

I scream so loud I hurt my own ears, my throat aching.

Edith just stares at me, her eyes wide, like a deer in headlights.

"You..." I hold up a shaky finger and point at Edith, my sudden rage and anger, I now realize, building up inside of me. 

"Angelica. Why are you being so unreasonable? Your feelings can't be hurt. You. Don't. HAVE THEM! Or at least, you SHOULDN'T!" She raises her voice, probably ttrying to get authority.

It hits me then. I can feel. I can feel emotions. I'm not like them anymore, I'm free.

I laugh hysterically, then I cry, then I shout, then I'm silent. Everything that's ever significantly happened to me pops in my mind and with it the emotion associated with it. How messed up this society is, my parents are dead, I've been brain-washed and somehow unable to feel until now, now I can feel. 

Then I realized I've expressed this all in front of Edith, and Rosie, staring at me silently. Then I turn silent, too.

Edith opens her mouth a few times and then closes it again, like a fish. Then she finally forms her mouth around the word, "Go."

She points to the door. "Go. GO!"

I scowl at her, then turn my back and start to walk to the front door. I place my hand on the door knob, then turn around again to look at Edith and Rosie, and what used to be home.

"They'll take me too....can't report....what if I'm blamed?....She probably can't feel, just crazy....yes, she's just crazy......not my child.....not my problem........" Edith is muttering nervously, her eyes flickering to me and then the stairs, as if she wants to flee. Even though she's the one that just kicked me out of her house.

Then she notices that I'm staring at her, half amused. She suddenly stops, and sophistically turns around and starts up the stairs without looking back once. "Goodbye, Angelica," I hear her whisper, almost to herself. "Come back if you change, if not stay away," Her voice is cold now.

I don't respond, I just give a half-laugh and push open the door. I am greeted instantly by a draft of cool air. 

I look back one last time and see Rosie. She sees me and starts to scream, lunging for my leg. 

Edith whips her head aorund, now at the top of the stairs, and rushes down again. She grabs Rosie and carries her up awkwardly positioned on her shoulder. 

Rosie's legs are kicking and her arms flailing, trying to crane her head from her uncomfortable posistion to look at me. She finds my eyes and I look straight into hers. She's always been really good at lip-reading, so I mouth, "I am so, so sorry. But I have to go now. Be strong. I'll come back for you someday, I promise." 

She nods, her eyes big and sad-looking. Her screams stop and a tear rolls down her cheek. Her body goes limp. Yet as soon as I close the door and Edith is muttering about calling her husband, Rosie takes one last look at me and sees I'm really leaving, then screams one last, final scream, her arms flailing and feet kicking again.

I close the door quickly, finding myself crying, not wanting to hear Rosie scream anymore.

I step off the front porch, unsure of what is to come now, now that I'm without my old home. I decide to go to the one place that I know best. The Park. The woods in the Park, to be exact.

Maybe, just maybe, I can help Brynne.