I'm sick of this shit

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What the fuck?

What is this, the third fucking time?

That you broke my heart into a million pieces.

Now it's unfixable,

no one can put me back together again.

I'm sick of you doing this shit

so I hope you know it's never happening again

and that's why I'm thinking twice about friendship.

I don't think I can believe you

when you've betrayed me this many fucking times

but, you know, I understand.

I get why you broke up with me.

You realized that I'm a worthless piece of shit

and that I'm a waste of your fucking time

and that my life is a complete shit hole

that you don't want to be a part of...

and now I can't sleep at night again,

the sleepless nights thinking about you will continue

and if I could help it I really would

because I'm tired of not getting over you.

I'd like to just have a gun

so that I can put it to my temple

and pull the fucking trigger,

too bad it just isn't that simple.

How to die causing the least pain possible,

that's what I'd like to know.

This life of mine is not worth living for.

I am nothing and I could never be something more than that.

My dream was to do something so fucking cool

that when I died, people would care, they would cry

because someone special had died

but that'll never happen for me

because I don't so anything cool at all.

I wanna be on a stage in a band,

it's all I've ever wanted to do

but I'm probably not good enough, too young

and when I get old enought I won't be able to

because I'll have to work every day

to try to support myself.

Why the fuck's reality such a fucking bitch?

That is why, in conclusion of course

because this is my only conclusion,

I'm sick of myself, my whole fucking existence

and I don't believe I even deserve to live

because I contribute nothing good to the world.

Actually I contribute the opposite of good

and that was the meaning to my existence

to contriute anything bad to the world

because that's the only thing I can do right.

I believe that I should be dead,

on the side of the street somewhere in a gutter

just to save the world from my existence.

So maybe one day I'll leave my folks a note

saying I ran away, so they don't worry,

and walk aimlessly for a very long time

just thinking over everything, my whole life,

then I'll decide everything's over for me

and kill myself on the spot.

Ha. What a fantasy!

The weird part is I'm completely serious

and right now I'm hoping that a miracle kills me

because I can't go on living anymore.

I've lost everything that ever meant anything to me.

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