Boarding with the Bad Boy [COMPLETE + BONUS published edition]

Eighty Four West

"Logan!" I'm almost in the parking lot when I hear him. Against my better judgment, I spin, keys in hand.

"He's your dad," I spit, pointing a finger at the brick Admissions building. Sam doesn't deny it and he doesn't back down.

"And all that shit about your mom? Hollinger? How you kept me at Ryder because of her influence over Carr?"

Both Sam's hands move to his hair, digging over his scalp. His pained expression only makes me angrier.

"A lie."

"You mean another lie." I turn away, hitting the remote lock and scanning the lot for my truck.

"Please, Logan. Hear me out."

I glance over my shoulder, but there's nothing in it. "Come on, Sam." I can hear how defeated I am, how done. Somehow, the sound of my voice makes my feelings real and I know, without a doubt, that when I get in my truck I'm not going to Ryan's or Jill's, or anywhere else from where I might circle back to Ryder. I'm going straight west until I hit Cleveland.

Sam scans my face and he sees it too. "I couldn't tell you," he whispers. I'm glad, the tiniest bit, that he's not apologizing.

"I wish you had, though." I will myself not to snarl or break down.

"I'm so—"

"Please," I say. "Don't."

Sam runs his hands through his unwieldy hair again, his eyes rimmed red as if he's about to cry. I can't stand it.

I turn from him for the thousandth time, but we both know that this is unlike the others. As much as I love him—and I goddamn do—I can't trust him, and the cracking taking place in my chest...I won't survive this if I don't walk away now. For good.

"Logan," Sam begs from behind me. I pretend I don't hear him. I move through the lot, sliding easily out of the path of an oncoming group of Ryder swimmers. They pause when they see me, but I'm not stopping, and I'm not crying. Not yet, anyway.

Almost without my realizing it, I'm behind the wheel of my old truck, navigating the winding driveway, taking a right toward downtown and blowing through it, one hand riding the waves of air out my window. I follow signs to I-84 W and think about what the hell I'm going to do for the next foreseeable future in Ohio, how I'm going to nail Brandon, Jared, Raffi, and Nick to the wall from halfway across the country. I let those questions consume me. I force them in front of the too-painful memory of Sam's lips on my neck, my hips, my mouth. When it doesn't work, I pretend Sam didn't promise his mom kept me at Ryder before kissing me so well I knew I was his for life. And when that breaks down, I remind myself that I may be devastated, broken, and lost, but I'm free. I'm free. 

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OKAY, I have to apologize for the tiny finale! I wasn't breaking up chapters as well as I thought, but now...I want to know what you think! Is there more for Logan and Sam? Is this the way things were meant to end? Did you hate the book as a whole? Love it? 

Either way, I love you guys for sticking with me on my first foray into noveling. You're the very best! xxc