Blackmailed || A Reader x Draco Malfoy Story

I'll wait

               tw???? there is very brief mention of suicide

                 It's August 31, tomorrow officially mark one month since I've murdered that muggle. I can still hear her empty cries when I'm alone in the dark corner of my room. My training didn't get any easier after that. It got worse and when I thought it wasn't possible for me to become more miserable than I already was Bellatrix made sure to prove me wrong. I pushed myself to do as I was told and I forced my feelings to the back of my mind. Do what you're told. This isn't the time to act like a hero. Do what you can to survive. This is what I repeated in my mind. I've seen what happens to people who refuse to listen. I don't think I could handle the things that would happen to me if I disobey them.

Yes, I'm a coward. I'm too scared to die at their hand. I've considered ending things myself. I was tired of becoming the monster that I am right now. I can't do it though. I'm too scared to die. I don't want to feel the pain that will come with it. Bellatrix knew this. She knew I was scared and she knew I'd do anything now. She'd done it. She had broken me. I no longer owned myself. I was completely obedient. Because of this, I gained Bellatrix's favor and even the dark lord himself was a little partial to me. I had "proven my worth" according to Bellatrix. I gained their trust and yesterday, at the most recent meeting, I was given the privilege to travel freely on my own. Of course, as most things, this "freedom" came with some strings attached I would have to report everything I did to Bellatrix.

However, despite that small condition, this was a big thing for me. Finally, I could leave this suffocating house, even though I was like a dog with a leash and I couldn't go very far. It was something.

_____

I ran a brush through my hair and pulled on a . With the soft slam of my door, I went on my way down to the kitchen. Normally I would be forced to join Bellatrix, Mr. and Mrs. Malfoy for breakfast in the hall. However, since the meeting with the dark lord was yesterday some sort of important discussion was going on in the hall still. I wasn't allowed to be there till they were done. I walked quietly to not disturb the silence that settled in almost most of the mansion. I reached to grab the handle of the door leading down to the kitchen when the door opened.

To my dread it was a familiar face. None other than Draco Malfoy. He was sickly pale; I could tell he was under a lot of stress. He wore a surprised expression, I made great effort to avoid him whenever our paths crossed. His lips parted as if he were about to say something but I quickly turned away not wanting to hear anything. He tightly grabbed my arm and kept me from leaving. "Let me go Draco," I said sternly not turning around to face him.

"Please..." He whispered. "Please let's just talk this once. Please don't ignore me." His tone sounded as if he were begging. I remained unmoved though. "Please just look at me." I sighed lightly, after everything there was still a small part of me that had a hard time refusing him when he sounds like this. "I'll be leaving for Hogwarts tomorrow; can you at least give me this short moment before I go?" I turned slowly and looked up at him. His stormy gray eyes were filled with grief. Has he suffered as badly as I have? I wondered. He was still holding onto tightly to me. His hands were trembling. I felt a slight pang in my chest seeing him in such a state. I grabbed his hand tightly and pulled him along behind me. I walked quickly till we reached outer gate of the mansion. None of us spoke a word, though he was probably confused. We walked beyond the gate and I apparated us away from here.

When we landed we were greeted by rain pouring heavily on us. We stood before a square building surrounded by high railings. It was run-down, but clean, still the atmosphere around it was grim. "Where are we?" Draco spoke breaking our streak of silence.