Lost in the Mind

The New Me

I could feel happiness throughout my body, and my mind. I couldn't express the exhilaration I am feeling as I came back home. The old and boring me was gone, the new me was coming back from her Californian childhood.

Instantly darkness shot all around me. And slowly, light was shining through my eyelids. I opened my eyes to reveal a glorious bright light right above me. It was going forth and back. I followed it with my eyes not knowing that it was a test to see if my reflexes were working. When the light moved away from my eyes, I could see nurses and doctors swarming around me.

"Canada? Canada can you hear me?" One of the nurses called out. I took a breath and realized that I was back in the spherical room.

"Hello, everyone. What's going on?" I said in a very optimistic voice. I saw smiles go around the room. Then clapping roared all around me. This time it wasn't for another person, this was for me. I for once, earned the glory for a couple of seconds. I looked at my arms and saw that my arms and legs were still fastened. Then, the nurses untied me. Two of them unfastened me, the other two detached the wires from my head. I lifted my upper body, remembering that I was still on the table. I felt really sore from sitting on the table for so long. Some nurses handed me my old clothes for me to change back to. I looked at my clothes closely. They looked so dark and lonely. When was the last time I wore bright colors? I lifted myself from the table to go into that room to change back to my clothes.

When I got back I wandered the room trying to look for Dad. I didn't see him anywhere. I saw Nurse Judy talking with some doctors and then a couple of nurses looking over some documents. I couldn't believe I had done the impossible, literally. Then I started to wonder how long I was in that mind.

Avery. I looked to my right and saw Avery, looking a bit tired but talking to one of the doctors. I took a breath, feeling an immense pressure in my chest and head. I realized just how rude I was before to him. I didn't mean it. I was just really upset, it all happened so fast that I couldn't comprehend what I was doing before. I decided to go apologize to him. I stood up from the table, and I walked over to Avery. He saw me looking at him, his warm brown eyes stared at me. His face was a bit demure but his lips were shaped into a quiet smile. He was still sitting on the table, his arms propped back to support his upper weight. I walked until we were facing each other. I took a breath and I exhaled in nervousness. I put both of my hands in my pocket jeans, I was looking down at the floor. I needed to look in his eyes to let him know what I was about to say.

"Avery, I ..." His arms grabbed for me and he pulled me in for a hug. I was ecstatic, I did not see that coming. My arms still hugs down at both sides while Avery's arms wrapped around my body. I could hear his breath trailing down my back, it seemed very light but it was heavy in my mind for whatever reason. If I didn't return his embrace then I might regret it later on. I managed to get my arms up for me to hug his body in return for his embrace. I closed my eyes in satisfaction, this was the perfect way to make up for something. Avery lightened his grip to look at my face. His hands held my back gently. My hands were on his clavicle. Our eyes met in a total gaze. We didn't look away. Eventually, I worked up the nerve to say what I was going to speak before. His legs were apart a little, but my thighs were in the gap between his legs.

 "Avery, I am very sorry. I was rude before, is there anything I can do to make it up?" My voice was almost in a whisper. I couldn't really hear my own voice. I could only listen to the constant pattering of my beating heart.

Avery smiled, his normal smile that I adored so much. What happened after that is indescribable. His face started coming close to mine, he started pulling my body in with his hands. I could only hear my heart beating faster at that point. Then he kissed me on the cheek. I was in total shock. My mouth flew open a bit. When he pulled back, his smile was very sweet and very comforting. I could still feel his hands behind my spine. 

"Meet me in your backyard, under the spot I made for us at 6:00 PM tomorrow. Don't be late." He winked twice. My breath hitched, I couldn't help it. This was all too fast. The gaze we gave each other was so calming. I didn't feel lost in his eyes, I felt wanted in his eyes.

I felt a hand come on my shoulder, I looked back and it was Dad. His smile looked very proud and tall. He came in for a hug, Avery's hands slipped off my back so that Dad could put his hands behind me. I felt very much at home when Dad gave me that embrace. He let go and slipped his hands into mine. He stepped back, his hands on mine. He was taking a look at my whole body. When he was done his eyes sparkled a bit.

"Canada, I am so proud of you. Look at you, I bet you feel so new." His smile was so nice. It looked like he was about to cry, which I haven't seen him do. I smiled back at him.

"You have no idea, Dad."

When Dad drove me and Avery back to my house, it felt so good. I looked out the window and the sun was just about done with setting outside. There wasn't any clouds out like it once was. It was going to be a starry night. I could actually see the star constellation Gemini. That was my Dad's zodiac sign. In April and May, you can see Gemini can be seen when the sun has set. Right now it was towards the end of April. Summer vacation was around the corner. Now I could see it clearly. It hung in the sky so nicely, all of the stars that were apart of Gemini seemed woven into the night sky.

"Dad! I can see your star constellation!" I yelled out to Dad from the back seat. He peered where I was looking for a quick moment.

"Oh yeah, so it is." He had a smile upon his face and looked back at the road. I could hear a seat belt moving close to me. Avery. Avery was close to my side now, trying to look at the constellation. His face was close to mine, our faces practically touching the glass window. I looked at Avery. He looked at me. Our gaze was deep again, just like in the hospital. He smiled at me. I smiled back. 

We both looked at the constellation again. I couldn't believe that I was noticing the world for the first time in a long while. I had studied stars in class before, but I never got the chance to actually see them in the sky. Now I could really see the beauty of our Earth. How much we don't see until it is gone.