Something About Septimus

14 - Awkward...Again.

The thought kind of scared me. Of course I like Spencer. He's sweet and nice and we do a lot of things together (and by a lot of things I mean eating food and watching movies and taking a walk once in a while.) I had to admit that my relationship with Spencer was a little bit boring. But Septimus admitting that he liked me kind of made me rethink my feelings for Spencer. Uh-oh my mind thought. What am I going to do? I mean...I think I like Spencer...or what if I actually liked Septimus?  Oh I don't know! It's not like I'm going to leave Spencer for his brother! That's just not right in anyone's book.

I groaned and buried my head in my hands. Someone cleared their throat and I turned my head to find Septimus still on the branch beside me. His eyebrows were raised with a slight frown forming on his mouth. I remained silent and I shook my head at him, my eyes downcast.  The suspense must be killing him. It was killing me too.

Septimus' frown deepened and his eyes became sad. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair again.

My eyes wandered down to his jacket sleeve and I noticed a color that should not have been there. There were blood droplets on the sleeve and the cuff of his coat. My hand reached out to touch it. The blood was still slightly wet.

"Uhm Septimus...What happened to you?" I asked as I lifted up his sleeve to examine the blood.

He quickly pulled his arm away. "Nothing happened Etta. I had a nosebleed earlier and I forgot to wash the blood off my jacket. That's all."

The whole time his eyes were fixated on the moon and his response made me a little suspicious. I raised my eyebrows at him as if hinting him to tell me something that he was hiding.

"Don't worry about it. I promise that it's nothing."

I nodded, not satisfied with his answer. 

"And it's OK Etta. You don't have to say anything about what I said. I understand. I really do. You are never going to like me in the way that I do and I want you to just stay with my brother OK? You two seem really happy together and I encourage you--"

I cut him off by doing something really stupid.

I kissed him...for the second time.

At first both of us were shocked. (I think I was more shocked than him because I was not expecting for me to do this) After the initial surprise went away he finally started kissing back. I don't know why I did this or even why I didn't stop...it just felt right.

Kissing him was exactly how I remember. His lips were soft and gentle...but very cautious and careful as if he was expecting me to pull away any second or for him to pull himself away. This kiss felt so much more different than our last one. There was no tugging sensation in my gut or chest and nothing was pulling me towards him. This kiss was of my own free will.

I had one hand gripping the tree branch and my other hand resting on Septimus's arm, slightly gripping his jacket sleeve. Both of his hands were on my face. Without breaking the kiss I slowly scooted closer to him to feel more secure (I still felt like I was about to fall out of the tree.)

It felt weird  and good at the same time.

Was it bad that I enjoyed kissing Septimus more than I did Spencer?

Yes it was bad Etta, very very bad.

Spencer and I actually didn't kiss that much. He only gave me a kiss on the cheek or the forehead. I surmised that only once he kissed me on the lips and that was probably only for a minute or two. I've kissed Septimus only twice and that already more than Spencer in a whole 2-3 months of dating. 

Oh Etta what have you got yourself into?

I wanted to shake my head and slap myself on the forehead but that would be kind of bad because Septimus and I were still lip locked. We stopped for air a couple of times but other than that we were still kissing! And I liked it!