New Girl - The Creatures

Chapter 15

I woke up the next morning feeling extremely stiff, at first not remembering what happened the night prior. It all came flooding back, and I felt my heart plummet again. No tears came this time though, thank god. I sat up, rubbed my sore eyes, and went to my bathroom to assess the damage. My hair was absolutely wild, and the makeup I was too upset to remove was smeared all around my eyes.

I brushed my teeth with one hand and combed through my hair with water on my other hand, trying to untangle the mess that it was. After making it more manageable, I wiped off my remaining makeup and left the bathroom without reapplying. I lacked the energy and patience to do anything cosmetic past unknotting my hair and making it look like I wasn't a raccoon.

Shivering slightly from the chill in my room, I swapped my pajama pants for a pair of dark gray joggers, left my hoodie from last night on, grabbed my phone and proceeded downstairs to drink my weight in coffee. I walked to the kitchen while checking my phone, seeing that it was a little after 10 AM. I had a new text from James, sent from earlier this morning.

"When you get back from the VA, do you want to go out and grab some donuts to bring back to the house? Jordan said we can use his car since neither of us has our own and I finally fucking got my license last month."

My stomach rumbled as if on command. I quickly wrote a reply.

"Yeah, of course, meet you outside in 5?"

I got a thumbs up emoji in response, and I headed back upstairs to get my wallet. Just as I walked onto the landing, I saw a trace of movement and Seamus' door quickly snap shut. I felt a nervous jolt but shrugged it off as quickly as I could and went outside after I grabbed my things. I was blasted with cold air the second I opened the door; today was going to be overcast and if I was lucky, there might be a bit of snow later tonight. James was waiting for me, also sporting a black hoodie but with the WWE logo in the center. He mock saluted me before climbing into the already running car, and I followed suit. I was immediately enveloped in warm air, sighing as I sank into the passenger seat.

"I figured having the heat on would be good since that god damn princess room gets so fucking cold," James said as he buckled in. "The pink is no longer, I'm afraid," I said while I did the same. James gasped dramatically and clutched his chest. "How fucking dare you! It was beautiful!" he yelled, making me laugh. As we pulled out of the driveway, James played Papa Roach on his phone, and we were quiet for a couple of minutes.

"So, what's the real reason why you went to bed so early last night?" he asked, breaking the silence. I could feel my face fall as I looked out the window. "What do you mean? I was just tired," I said, trying to sound nonchalant. "I don't want to like, push my boundaries or anything," he said, shifting slightly in his seat as he merged lanes. I didn't even realize we were on the highway before I remembered that the nearest Dunkin' Donuts was about 15 minutes away. "But I was going to apologize for making things weird when I walked in on you and Seamus when I heard you crying."

I glanced at him for a second, and I saw the concern in his eyes. I sighed deeply, and slouched down somewhat, wanting nothing more than to be back in bed. "Yeah. You remember the other night before I fell down when you told me that it really seemed like Seamus liked me?" I said, playing with my hair to distract myself and keep from getting upset.

"I do. Why, was I wrong?" he asked, sounding worried. "Nope, you were very right. I didn't have the chance to tell you, but I've been feeling the exact same way about him. I was going to wait a little while to talk to him about it, but then a few things happened and I felt compelled to tell him then." I left out the part about Aleks touching my forehead since the last thing I wanted was for more people to get mad at him.

"So everything should be good now, right? You guys can date and the fans will go crazy over it and you two can me 7 million dollars," James said enthusiastically, obviously trying to get a laugh out of me. I gave him a faint chuckle but then grimaced at the thought of what could have happened last night.

"God, I wish. Instead, after I poured my heart out to him about what a giant, dorky crush I have on him, he told me he felt the exact same way and said all of the same things I'd been thinking. But then he told me it couldn't work and that he wanted us to pretend like nothing was ever said and that trying to date was too 'dangerous'." I felt a lump grow in my throat. We'd just gotten to Dunkin' Donuts, and the scent of dough and coffee as we walked in was somewhat comforting.

We dropped the subject while we ordered 2 dozen variety donuts and a coffee for me for the sake of the sleepy middle-aged man cashiering. While we waited for our order, James started talking again. "Fuck, I'm really sorry Sam. I shouldn't have said anything to you about it the other night, that was unfair of me," he said, and he really did sound sorry.

"Please don't apologize, James, you were just trying to look out for me. It means a lot," I told him, not wanting him to feel like he needed to walk on eggshells around me. "I just don't get it, you two would be so cute together," he said. It was nice to see this softer side of James, as much as I enjoyed his loud and robust one.

"I don't either. I'm just gonna stay clear until he starts dating someone a couple of months from now while I try to see if it's legal for me to marry my camera or some bullshit. It's kind of funny." I said, chuckling bitterly. "What is?" James asked, standing up to grab the donuts that were now being called out.

"This is the first time I've ever really felt like this about anyone. I'd have like passing crushes on guys in high school, but I never said anything and they tended to fizzle out and I didn't really care enough to try to do anything about it. And the one time I do, this blows up in my face. I'm 21 and I've never even had a stupid boyfriend," I said, my voice catching slightly at the end. "Shit, I'm sorry. I know what you mean; I'm 20 and I'm in the exact same position with girls," he said, a faint trace of regret coloring his tone.

I was surprised. James is such a thoughtful and funny person, and most of the guys in the group had girlfriends. I didn't say anything til we got back into the car after safely securing the donuts in the back seat and my mocha coffee in hand. "Y'know what? Fuck dating," I said, trying to lighten the mood so James wouldn't dwell on the topic of romance. He looked up, surprised with the vigor I had in my voice.

"It's fucking lame and I don't think either one of should worry about it right now. You're close to hitting a million subs on YouTube and I just uploaded my first video the other day and we're young and good people that shouldn't worry about that kind of shit," I said, trying to convince myself as much I was trying to convince James. He started to grin, and we drove back to house talking about how he planned on celebrating a million subs and how I'd have to try to sell my kidneys to buy more games to get my channel moving. As we got back onto the highway, I thought distantly about how I'd have to keep up the same school of thought I was preaching about when living right down the hall from Seamus, constantly reminded of how I could be holding his hand if things were different.