New Girl - The Creatures

Chapter 42

A few hours later, after I'd recorded some Skyrim and began the rendering process on YouTube, I decided to rejoin the land of the living and leave my room. Despite running around the mountains of Skyrim and pretending to be the Dragonborn, my mind could focus on nothing but James. Every time I thought about him, his voice, his eyes, the way his hands fit perfectly in my own, my heart shot into my throat and my stomach was doing somersaults. I couldn't help but grin like an idiot every time this happened to me.

I trailed down the stairs, having changed into a large blue argyle sweater and some leggings as the house grew colder with the sunset. I felt like I was gliding, barely touching the faux wood paneling that had done me wrong a month and some change prior. I could walk through walls if I wanted to, surely, for no one could possibly feel this elated and not have some kind of spectacular superpower broiling just beneath the surface.

I could hear some commotion from the basement, which simply made me more excited at the prospect of sharing this joy with my friends. I instead detoured to the kitchen to grab some apple juice (my addiction to coffee had started to quell after I survived off it for so long) when I saw James. He was standing in front of the refrigerator, singing quietly to himself as he grabbed something to drink. He didn't know I was standing there, because he likely would have stopped singing and instead go into meme mode to make me laugh. He was singing something I'd never thought I'd heard him listen to; one of my favorite songs by alt-J, called Something Good. James had never been very in to my brand of music, so to hear him singing lightly to one of the best coffee shop bands there was caused something for intrigue.

I stood against the frame of the kitchen doorway, smiling at him, admiring the relaxed look on his face as he hummed the parts he didn't know the words to. He turned so his back was to me, which gave me the opportunity to strike. I leapt at him, not unlike a monkey at the zoo, and covered his eyes. 

"Fuck! Who's trying to rob me? I'll sue you!" he yelled, grinning wildly. "Guess who?" I said, hoping he'd play along. "While your voice may be high enough to be Aleks, I'm gonna have to go with Jordan because of how silky smooth your hands are. Gimme a kiss, Hoardan," he said, making a smoochy face like a fish. I stopped covering his eyes to instead poke him in his sides. 

The reaction I got was visceral. He emitted a noise like a hyena and was incapacitated within seconds of me tickling him. He crumpled to the floor, laughing hysterically. I stared at him, wide-eyed. "Okay, crackhead," I teased, laughing at the over dramatized reaction he had. 

"I-I-hahaha- I'm very ticklish...heh..you're lucky I didn't flail like I usually do," he said, wheezing with laughter and struggling to get something coherent out. "Jesus, we both react like a horse that got spooked when getting tickled. We're gonna end up killing each other if we keep this up," I said, holding out my hand to help him. 

"That can be arranged," he said creepily, grabbing a hold of my hand. He bamboozled me and pulled me down to be by him on the floor, catching me with his arms before I had the chance to hit my head on the linoleum.

"You're an ass," I said, grinning at him. He gazed back at me, smiling radiantly. He kissed me, bringing me closer to him and trailing his fingers on my upper back. I reluctantly pulled away. "James, we need to be careful," I pleaded, looking frantically at the door way of the kitchen. He pouted but let me get up anyway, and didn't pull me down again when I held out my hand to help him up. 

He walked over to the stairs that lead to the basement (we made an unspoken agreement to not enter the room at the same time) while I grabbed my apple juice and set it on the counter. A minute or so later, after I heard him engaging in banter with Aleks, I traipsed down the stairs and into the basement.

All 6 of the boys were watching a horror movie, sitting in the dark, and the smell of popcorn wafting in the space. Dan was happily watching, wincing, and "oohing" at all the right parts. Max and Seamus were cracking jokes, Sly was screeching like a scream queen while Aleks pretended to not be just as scared, and Jordan was about to be harassed by James, who was creeping up behind him with a small cup of a liquid I hoped to be water. 

Just as a jump scare unfolded on the screen, James made a howl, not unlike a banshee, and tipped the cup of water right onto Jordan's crotch. "James! You're gonna get it!" Jordan hollered, leaping up and eyeing James from across the row of leather armchairs that the others were sprawled in. James ran up to the stairs, where I was currently standing as an obstacle.

"I'm not moving," I laughed, redeeming my sweet revenge from when he tricked me and pulled me onto the ground in the kitchen moments ago. "Then I guess I'll have to take you with me," he grinned devilishly. In a fluid motion, he grabbed me by the waist and hoisted me over his shoulder. I forgot that I still weighed very little, having only just reached 110 with the assistance of some protein supplements. I screamed and patted his back, trying not to actually hurt him with my slaps, yelling for him to put me down.

"He's got a hostage!" Aleks yelled. "Men! Grab your weapons!" Jordan yelled as we raced up the stairs. I lived here long enough to know that they kept a majority of the Nerf guns in the basement, which I'm sure they were about to use at their disposal. James set me down at the top of the stairs, and we ran off to hide somewhere in the house. I was guilty by association now, but I knew that I had hidden a small Nerf gun somewhere. I just couldn't remember for the life of me where it was.

We took off to the kitchen, which had the most hiding spots at the ready. We passed the wine bar in the hall when I remembered that I had stashed the Nerf gun in the wine rack for safekeeping. James ran ahead to the kitchen, and I fell back to retrieve my weapon. Just as I turned, I ran into a loaded Nerf gun from Aleks. I held up my hands, and then pressed a single finger to my lips. He nodded as the others came up behind him. I motioned for them to follow me as I crept to the kitchen.

"James!" I whispered. I saw him peek out from in the pantry. "Stay where you are, I'm coming to hide with you!" I said, watching him close the pantry door as a safety precaution. I moved in front of the door, the rest of the guys standing behind me menacingly. I drew my weapon, cocked it, and opened the door of the pantry. The mischievous grin on James' face fell. "No! You traitor!" he yelled, a slight hint of humor giving away his facade of betrayal. "The game was rigged from the start," I said, referencing Fallout New Vegas as I fired foam bullets at him.

He yelled with laughter as I stepped to the side for the others, particularly Jordan, to get their revenge for James' hijinks. I returned to my forgotten glass of apple juice and relished it while watching the boys attack James, all of them shaking with laughter. One thing led to another, which I'm believing was a bout of friendly fire, and the boys all started attacking each other. Before I knew it, James had wrestled a nerf bow and arrow out of Sky's hands, who was too distracted by a charging Aleks to notice.

"You have committed crimes against Skyrim and her people. What say you in your defense?" James bellowed at me, a foam arrow loaded and pointed straight at my chest. "I die for my people," I said bravely, anticipating the blow any second. But it never came. I opened one eye to see that everyone else had run out of the kitchen, a full-on Nerf war unfolding in the house. James and I were all that was left from the great Taking of the Pantry onslaught.

Instead, James placed his thumb under my chin, resting his forefinger on the front of it. He lifted my head up and kissed me, making me melt and drop my cup of apple juice right onto his feet. "No! Betrayed again!" he yelled, laughing as he looked down at his now juice-soaked socks. I tried to make a run for it but was immediately shot in the ass on my way out of the kitchen. James ran past me, laughing gleefully as he raced through the house to wreak havoc on his friends. I smiled as I watched them sneak around and barrage one another, noting happily that I was a part of quite possibly the weirdest family on earth.