Denmark's Final Arranged Marriage

Chapter Eight - Questions

Carson and I laid on the cold and damp stone floor of the Gazebo for what honestly felt to me like forever and though we could hear even the softest of sounds coming from one another it was silent moments like these the ones where neither of us did much more than breathe in the lowest of possible ways one could breathe.

It wasn't until moments like this that I remember where I was and who was beside me, his face no more than inches from mine as our bodies laid in opposite direction from each other while face's couldn't be closer without it looking like something else.

I could have gone over the possibilities of 'something else' in my head over and over again if it hadn't been for Carson's voice pulling me out of my thoughts, he had that habit recently and if that already wasn't enough the question that left his mouth left me feeling perfectly dumbfounded.

"Why did you accept to come to Denmark?" asked Carson as I froze in place not sure of what to say, Why had I come? I could have done something else like run? Or maybe just not come and rebel or something.

But I didn't, I chose to come here instead. I chose to try and break this off face to face but why?

"I think I wanted out." I said my words trailing off as this came as a new realization for myself as well as for Carson.

At this Carson turned his head to one side to look at me and even though I could only see him by the corner of my eye I could still see those blue eyes of his piercing right through me so I did the only thing I could do, I closed mine.

What was I doing here? I asked myself as the images of my brother and my friends came to mind.

This wasn't my world, I didn't belong in Denmark and I definitely didn't belong here with it's Prince.

Who did I think I was getting to know him while we were both scattered on the cold stone floor thinking for maybe a second that he wasn't half bad, that maybe it could work even as friendship it's not like I dreamed of falling in love or getting married, having children? That wasn't for me.

I didn't care about losing my right to any of that what I did care about was that I wasn't even given the right.

Looking back at my childhood I now see the tweaks my mother pulled and the way she so easily manipulated my every move and not just mine, but Kevin.

My sweet brother had to suffer for this being shoved aside except for the events that called for him he was living in my shadow and I never even noticed and he never complained.

He was such a good brother to his clueless sister that he followed her and her mother around craving the attention given to her yet never once getting it and what did I do?

I never noticed not until it hit like a hot rock that night during tea and yet there he was being the good brother he'd always been.

If it hadn't been for the sudden cold touch to my left cheekbone I would have never even realized I'd been crying this whole time.

I watched as Carson pulled back his hand bringing it to his face as he looked at the tear drop lingering on his finger. He stared at it for a moment before rubbing it over with his thumb and bringing his eyes to me once more.

"I'm sorry I asked." He said and for the first time since he's looked at me, and I mean really looked at me those icy blue eyes of his weren't cold, they were anything but. At this moment they were like a stormy ocean filled with endless waves of emotions.

I shook my head softly as well as I could while still on the floor.

"Don't be" I said honestly. A faint smile on my lips as I tried to assure him I was fine.