sauve-moi || Brallon

chapter seven ||

Brendon's POV//

I woke up and stretched out my legs. My sleepy eyes slowly wandered open to see a sleeping Dallon Weekes in my bed next to me. I placed my hand on his chest and placed a small peck on his neck. He yawned and sat up next to me after blinking his eyes open.

"Mornin' Dal." I said, winking.

"It's too early for you to be this cute." He said, flipping onto his side and pulling the covers over his head.

I moved the blankets back down to his shoulders and ran my fingers through his hair slowly. I licked my lips and stood up to go get some breakfast from the kitchen for the two of us. Dallon was already falling asleep again and wasn't going to feed himself.

I opened the door and walked past the bunks. In the kitchen I saw a smirking Dan and Kenny, holding in laughter. I ignored them and went back to making my coffee for Dallon and I heard the door open and Zack walked in.

"Well I guess somebody had some fun last night." Zack said, practically choking on his laughter.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I replied smugly, continuing my breakfast.

"Oh, nothing, you just look like you had a great time." Dan said, emphasizing the word look.

It hit me like a bullet. I carefully walked over to the mirror, trying to maintain my joking personality, and examined myself. My neck, chest, and back was littered with 10-20 hickeys. I couldn't hold in my laughter and embarrassment and walked back over to the boys.

"I have no idea what you guys mean." I said, holding in a smile.

"Oh pardon me, Brendon" Kenny said, holding in spit. "It looks like you got in a fight! are you okay?"

"Nice one, Kenny." I said sarcastically. "my buddy over there just couldn't control himself."

I pointed to the bedroom before grabbing the breakfast and returning to Dallon. I walked back and set the tray of food and coffee on the side table.

A tired Dallon shifted awake and stretched his arms out to me. His eyes looked up and met mine before looking at my body. He smiled and let out a small giggle as he looked at the hickeys across my body. A rose pink blush met his cheeks.

"Sorry." He squeaked out in his calm and soothing morning voice.

"It's okay, baby." I said, running my fingers through his hair again.

I was really making a habit of running my fingers through his hair. It was just addicting to do. His Arctic blue eyes would meet my mahogany brown ones Id make him smile.

My main goal lately has been to make him smile. Dallon was just perfect. He had a heart of gold, a voice like smooth butter, a beautiful laugh, and he deserved endless smiles. I was happy if he was happy. I know that his happiness for now is temporary but maybe if things stay at this rate our temporary things will end up being permanent. I really do care about him.

I snapped out of my thoughts and grabbed his hand, helping him out of bed. I pulled him up and walked him to the door. He gave me one last small kiss on the cheek before we had to return to the guys.

"Come on Dallon, you can't hide from them forever." I smiled.

"Fine," he said shyly, "Im never going to hear the end of this."

He pointed to my chest and opened the door for me. I stepped out first, holding Dallon's hand as he trudged along behind me nervously. As soon as we walked past the bunks, I heard Dan, Kenny, and Zack begin to snicker.

"Well isn't it the devil himself!" Dan teased at Dallon.

"Umm.... hey guys." Dallon said awkwardly, staring at the ground.

I squeezed his hand a little tighter to reassure him that I'm here. He looked up from the ground at met my eyes with a smile. He looked back at the three guys and gave them an awkward side smile, looking back and forth between me and them.

"So how about we get back to rehearsing and you know... actual band stuff?" Dallon said, twiddling his thumbs.

"Sounds good but you, Brendon, are going to need a covering shirt." Zack said, pointing to the purple and blue marks along my body.

I grabbed Dallon's hand again and walked off of the parked bus. We had arrived in our new stop in New Mexico that morning and the crew had already been loading the supplies into the venue. Dallon and I crossed the parking lot and passed by a few fans who had been camping out and waiting by the gates. Instinctively, Dallon had taken his hand from mine and placed it in his sweatshirt pocket. I didn't care if anyone saw us but I respected his wish to be closeted.

Dallon's POV//

I really love Brendon and I wish I could bring myself to just openly and proudly hold his hand in public. There's always that voice in the back of my head telling me that I don't deserve him or his love and sometimes I give in to it.

I pull my hand from his as we cross the parking lot filled with our busses. I didn't want to risk the fans at the gate seeing us. I already get enough hate as it is when I wasn't with Brendon and I don't even want to imagine what people will about me now. Brendon has been a good distraction on my mind but that black hole of negativity inside myself is growing and is getting harder to fight off. I thought for just a second I could stop the self harm but here I am, itching for a fix.

Brendon rested his head on my shoulder as soon as we got inside the arena. He looks almost angelic when he closes his eyes. I don't know why he has any feelings for me. Why would he? I'm an oversensitive, untalented, and unlovable freak. I know Im letting my dark thoughts take over but at this point I don't see the point in fighting.

"Dal?" Brendon says worriedly, placing his hand on my arm.

My breathing began to get more and more shallow as my mind began to race. I couldn't escape my thoughts. I honestly just want it all to end. I'm no good for Brendon and I don't even want to keep going. Suddenly, my knees gave out and I was on the floor with rushed breaths. I knew that I was having a panic attack but my brain couldn't register what made me calm down.

"Zack! Come quick!" Brendon screams, "Dallon is having a panic attack and nothing is helping!"

"We need to take him to the hospital!" Zack responds, picking me up in his arms as my eyes faded shut.

a/n: wow look at me updating semi regularly! I plan on updating every other day hopefully. i'm not sure how long this book is going to be but I know where im going with this. anyways, thank you so much for reading and remember that my dms are open to all.