Slick Depression

83

I see you

With her

Smiling

And laughing

Someone kill me now

Please

Then you look at me

I hate you

I hate you

So much

I love you

Which makes me hate myself

I hate you

I want to hate her

With her blonde hair

And how short she is

Her beautiful smile

And that perfect laugh

But I can't

I can't hate her

Because she did nothing wrong

She was herself

And you fell in love with her

But you

You did the worst thing imaginable

You played with my heart

You told me we had until the end of July

You encouraged my feelings

Why?

Why did you do it?

Because it was fun?

Because you were bored?

Because i was something new?

Why?

What warranted the pain I am now in?

I have to be busy

All the time

Or I'll think about you

I'll think about

How I couldn't think when you were so close to me

Or about how safe I felt

When you held me

I hate you

I hate you

I fucking hate you

But I don't

I'm dying

You don't know

You don't care

But I don't hate you

Not really

Because I can't help but

Love you

Which is what I really hate

Because I can't

I can't hate you

And I can't hate her

I can only hate myself

Because I'm the one who got myself into this situation

And I'm the one left in pain

I'm the one left feeling your lips on my cheek

And you hands on my body

While you're fine

You're over there

Laughing

kissing and holding her

Without a second thought to my wellbeing

I guess that's what I hate

I hate that you are so happy with her

While I'm here

While I can't breathe

And I can't sleep

I don't hate you

I don't hate her

I hate me

And

I hate that you're so fucking happy without me