Searching for my Identity

Prologue

My dear readers, I've got a few things which I'm changing now. I hope you're currently reading my Story and I want to say thank you to metrojen because she was a huge help at the editing again :-* thank you so much 

Logan's point of view

It was a big surprise when Rory told me that she was pregnant with twins. At first, I couldn't believe it, but then I was so happy about it. The whole pregnancy was a great experience for me. Especially for Rory.

Finn, Colin, Robert and I always thought that Rory was having two boys, but we were wrong. Definitely wrong. On the 14th of April 2010, our beautiful twins were born. I was so proud, although Rory always joked about my fainting in the delivery room.

We named our baby girls Nathalie Lorelai Honor and Norah Emma Katherine. Shortly after being born Norah was taken to NICU. It was one of the hardest 4 weeks in my whole life. Rory and I exchanged at regular intervals with the visits to the newborn intensive care unit to be with Norah.

It was a hard time for all of us. Particular for Rory because she couldn't build a bond to Norah. Our little baby girl was taken away from her immediately after birth, due to the fact that she had problems with breathing and a slight heart condition.

Sometimes it seemed to me as if it had been yesterday when I held Norah in my arms after 1 week. It was one of the most wonderful experiences in my life when I touched her little fingers and looked at me with her intense brown eyes.

But there were also days where I could hardly take a step into the hospital because I was so terribly scared that Norah's condition was getting worse again or the worst case scenario which can happen to any parent, that she had died overnight.

Fear was our constant companion during these terrible 28 days. Many tears were shed as I and Rory were standing in front of Norah's incubator during our visits at the NICU, watching every movement of her.

On 14th of May Rory and I had gotten good news from Norahâ's midwife. We were so glad that we could take her home finally after 4 weeks.

Of course, the first months weren't easy for us, but thankfully we made it. I never thought that it would be so much fun to have two precious girls. Everything from giving them some tummy time or just watching them sleep, there was never a dull moment.

The 14th of October 2010 changed our whole life. There are no words, and no family should ever have to go through what we have been through.

We had been at the park with the girls; Nathalie was lying out on the blanket we had laid down while Norah slept peacefully in her stroller. Rory's phone was ringing and she stepped aside to take it.

I turned back to Natalie as she attempted to crawl, I was so engrossed in the milestone our little one was about to achieve that I had completely forgotten to keep my eye on the stroller. Rory came back a few minutes later and sat down on the blanket. She started getting the girl's bottles ready for their afternoon snack and as she went to wake Norah to give her the bottle she was struck with the most intense fear any parent can face.

We looked around thinking maybe she had gotten out somehow. I know it doesn't seem logical but we were looking for anything other than the inevitable truth that our baby had been kidnapped. Picking up Nat in my arms I immediately called 911 while Rory searched the park frantically. After 30 mins and dropping my last name a few times the police told me they would send someone to the house to make a report shortly. I got off the phone and tried to comfort Rory as she cried hysterically in my arms.

In the short period of time between us leaving the park and the police arriving at our place, we called every friend and family member we could think of. Begrudgingly I called my father to see if he could pull some strings with some private detective buddies of his, to try and get the ball rolling.

Finn arrived first, he swooped in gathering Rory and Nat in a warm hug and giving me a consoling pat on the back, reassuring us that we would find our baby girl. As the police arrived Finn took Natalie with him to the kitchen to make tea and coffee for all of us.

Man was I ever glad to have him there.

After going through the protocol with the police, her description, what was she wearing, how old she is etc. The detective asked if there was anyone we could think of that would have a motive for doing this.

We couldn't think of anyone off the top of our heads and we had yet to receive any call or request for ransom, but with my family name, anything was possible.

I mean I would have paid any amount to get her back. But it didn't happen. I was devastated.

The first time was very hard for us and I often played with the thought of killing myself because pain and despair simply didn't go away. But on the other hand, there was Nathalie. She needed me and Rory.

And so here we are now. It has been nearly 14 years since Norah was taken. I regretted it every day that I couldn't protect her enough. Nathalie and our other kids, Grace, and Jacob, didn't have a clue about their sister Norah...

Prologue

14th April 2024

Logan was awakened by the rays of sunlight that entered the bedroom. Hesitantly, he opened his eyes and looked around. His wife Rory lay on the right side of the bed and slept like an angel.

He sighed softly and then turned back to the other side, which was a fatal mistake for him, as he looked closely at the family picture, which stood on his brown nightstand. This picture was taken 14 years ago today.

It showed him with his wife Rory and his little daughter Norah. For him, April 14th was the most painful day in the whole year.

His little "Honey," as he nicknamed her since she was in the world, was taken away from him on October 14th, 2010 without any consideration.

He paused for a moment, closed his tear-filled eyes, and with his left hand decided to put the picture in the drawer.

Logan couldn't bear to look at this picture anymore. There were so many unimagined emotions, which he had tried for years to get rid of.

And he simply didn't want to have to be reminded that he had failed so much because he couldn't protect his beautiful princess.

The little hands from Rory were just snaking around his body and then he turned around and looked into the beautiful blue eyes of his wife Rory.

"Oh, good morning Ace!" He whispered in a low voice. "Good morning, Logan, how did you sleep?" She greeted him yawning and snuggled to his slender body.

"Not really good, but it's ok hon..." He breathed almost silently and a lonely tear was running over his pale cheek.

"Oh darling I know how hard it is for you, especially today, but you're not alone. I'm thinking about Norah every day and it almost kills me that she isn't with us. And who knows how long we can keep it secret from our children. Somehow they will ask us why they can't enter her room down the hall." Rory said.

"I know Ace. However, I can't do it yet. Not now. The kids aren't ready yet to find out that they have a big sister. Can you imagine how bad that would be for our kids and especially for Nathalie! After all, she is Norah's twin sister, "Logan murmured quietly, fighting against his rising tears. Rory sighed and stroked her husband's back gently.