LIMIT ° you . kth . jjk [18+]

sixteen

"This is what you want, right?"

Chestnut eyes flicked open and you woke, your chest heaving up and down in staggered pants as your drowsy mind slowly tore itself away from your nightmare and eased inelegantly into a reality that, honestly, didn't do much to soothe your rattled nerves. 

You had tried so hard to push away the memories of that harrowing afternoon but it seemed like distance nor time did nothing to heal the invisible scars rendered into your flesh. Every careless bump into your shoulder, or gentle pat against your back was enough to send your hypersensitive heart into a manic frenzy as it readied it's titanium defenses against the clueless offender. You hoped that this trauma would slowly crumble away through sheer force of will, and yet, it persevered despite endless prayers for normalcy. 

Jungkook, in your jittered perception, was a sanctuary prepared to save you from the hellish abyss of school but even as your eyes searched for him, it was the ghostly after-image of Taehyung that haunted you. Though the younger male had severed all connections with his friend, he and Taehyung had been so closely bonded in your memory that every glance at him only served to remind you of the voracious beast you met in the classroom. 

Even the thought of him was enough to cause acrid bile to rise up at the back of your throat. You slowly exhaled through your nose and counted to ten. It felt far too mechanical, sure, but this was the only thing you could do if you wanted to prevent yourself from slipping into a dry heaving mess, shuddering and choking from the slightest brush against your skin. 

For now you just needed your space. If only you could've hid under your blankets and counted the days until you graduated from high school. Sadly, that day, separated by months of secular inertia, taunted you from afar and you knew you had to emerge from the cocoon of safety you had swathed yourself in. 

Today, like yesterday and the day before (so on and so forth), you had chosen to stay at home. 

One week. That was how long you had locked yourself in your bedroom. You were surprised at the tolerance of your family but your parents, thankfully, didn't bother to question your solitude knowing full well that a diligent student like you wouldn't just up and play hooky for the hell of it. Their concerns didn't go unnoticed by your discerning eye, but no matter how much you wanted to spill the rotten truth to their attentive ears, you just couldn't get the words to leave the muddled confines of your brain. 

Friends came and went like mailmen, dropping off assignments and notes into your mailbox if they hadn't bothered to breach the lobby door. You wanted to lie and say that it was enough and you were able to catch up with your studies through disastrously-scrawled paper alone, but you were falling farther and farther behind as each day greeted you with new information you didn't recognize. At this rate, your precious title of 'honour student' would rust and shed into mere flakes of copper, one gust away from disappearing completely. 

You wished you could burst into fine petals and fade into the clear azure of the sky as well. 

Your inner musings were rudely disrupted by the blaring horn of the door bell bouncing off the walls of the empty apartment. The clock ticked 4 and you could only assume that it was one of your friends dropping off the present of education once more. With the laziest of gaits, you dragged your feet to the intercom and stabbed a tired finger against the receiver. 

"Hello? Song residence." You mumbled in a bland monotone, giving electronic recordings a run for their money with the complete lack of care or emotion weaved into your flat tone. 

"Ahreum? It's me, um, Jungkook. I have some handouts from our homeroom teacher and I don't want to intrude or bother you, so, I'll just leave them in your mail slot. Get better s-"