Back to the Future Fan-fiction

Chapter Five || If Only You Knew

Doc Brown stood motionless next to his casket. The shock that had clouded him constantly seemed to make everything seem surreal, or at least it had been what desperately wished for. If he did believe the whole situation was truly happening, though, he knew internally he would never be able to bear it.

Please don't tell me not to cry

God, what had happened? Everything had happened so quickly so fast. It wasn't supposed to turn out like this. The future hadn't been written yet, true, but sure as hell wasn't supposed to happen like this. Things like that weren't supposed to happen. They couldn't happen.

Please don't say there say there isn't a reason why

So how did it happen that Marty Mcfly, his best friend, was now dead?

You don't know what I'm feeling

Doc had almost never imagined that he could outlive his best friend. The idea of it all was just all unrealistic. Marty had nearly his entire life ahead of him, and Doc had even seen his own bright future ahead. That was why everything was so difficult to piece together the series of unfortunate events that stumbled upon Doc Brown's life so suddenly.

The wet spots are from tears on the collar of this shirt

Why hadn't he seen this coming? Marty had saved him from his own death many times before, why so couldn't he return the favor? Maybe there was one thing he could of done to prevent him from getting his fate, but no. He didn't, and it was all because of a small fight. A damn fight. Doc clasped his head for his stupidity.

You think I should go on with this life

Fate. Doc thought to himself humorlessly. Would all of this would of happened, even if the hands of time hadn't interfered? Did destiny somehow want this all to occur? He mused quietly.

Forget about it and be strong

Doc had known Marty did get into a car crash, but now instead of just breaking his hand, his life taken by an accident. That he could of prevented by a few seconds.

But deep down, I am sad and don't want to go along

A light tap on his arm briefly brought him out of his pondering. "Emmett, honey, we better take our seats," Clara whispered softly to him, as more people begin to fill the pews.

I don't expect you to understand why

Doc nodded absent minded as they both walked to their seating. Doc sat through the service, entirely numb the whole way. Naturally it was normal to show emotion during his best friend's funeral, for gods sake, but his outer appearance seemed as if he was oblivious to the fact that he was dead. He couldn't even imagine the look at his parents.

For no apparent reason I start to break down and cry

After the funeral was over, Doc headed to his lab to douse himself in sorrow. Clara let him off with a sad sigh, but didn't protest despite how depressed he was. She knew he probably needed the time to separate himself from his work. He always did this when he was sad- it was a coping mechanism.

My life has changed forever, you see

Doc blindly walked into his lab. He hadn't set a foot in it since Marty had died, but now it seemed like the right place to wallow in his misery. There would be no one there to bother him now, to say everything would be okay when it clearly wasn't.

The first thing Doc saw when he had walked into his lab was his dismantled DeLorean. He faintly remembered the joy he had experienced on the night of his first successful run, but now it was now replaced by a deep sadness and anger at the infernal machine. Now it had seemed to be the bearer of horrible jokes and a cruel reminder that, even though he had the power of a time machine, he could do nothing at all to save Marty from his terrible fate.