How I feel

VII

"I actually hate you" he grumbled into the screen and glaring at me through the phone.

I started laughing and winked at him.

"Well now you know what I had to go through whilst you could just go surfing with the boys" I said seriously giving him a pointed look.

"Well how come you never complained" Carter whined on the other side.

"Because if you act really interested for a few hours mum buys you clothes and gives you lunch, and if you're really lucky you get ice-cream" I said enthusiastically. Secretly I just loved having alone time with mum and actually being a girl for a few hours.

"Yeah that's the only bonus" he mumbled picking the fluff off my blanket he had currently wrapped himself in.

"I feel like you aren't enjoying the only child life"

"I just miss you, like Matt and Jer I can deal without but I really miss you A" for a few minutes I was completely silent. Carter was never one to actually share his feelings so this was quite surprising.

"Car it's only been a month and a bit" I smiled at him,

"But I miss you too"

I couldn't believe it but I was getting a little emotional over our sibling heart-to-heart.

"Wanna watch a movie?" he asked.

"Yeah sure" I smiled.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few hours later, I emerged from my room.

We had ended up watching 'Just Go With It' with Adam Sandler and Jennifer Aniston, it was one of our favourite movies to watch together.

Carter fell asleep, so I begrudgingly ended the call.

I shut the door behind me, and headed towards the kitchen. I was hungry. Or maybe I just wanted ice-cream. I didn't know how much I missed home until I spoke to Carter this afternoon. I missed him coming home from school and telling me about his day, or just hanging out and watching movies. Or when he used to come and ask me for advice about his latest crush.

My eyes started to cloud over and I attempted to blink them away, but as usual in my moment of weakness I am always caught out.

"Hey Ally.... wait, are you okay?"

I groaned internally, god Adam why do you always have to see me in my finest moments? I turned around to face him, smiling brightly and ignoring the burning sensation on my eyes.

"Hey Adam! I'm fine, how are you? Doing well I hope?" I said overly loud and in a happy tune.

He just gave me a strange look that said, girl you fucking crazy, and slowly approached me. When he saw I wasn't going to do anything crazy like kick him or punch him in the face again he slowly brought me into a hug.

I stood limp in his arms for a whole two seconds before moulding myself into his strong arms, wrapping my arms around his back and burying my face into his chest.

"Try again?" he whispered in my ear.

"I miss home, and my little brother. And my mum. I just feel a bit lost that's all" I mumbled and rubbed my face against his chest to get ride of the tears that had started to fall.

 He soothingly rubbed my back and shushed me,

"Hey, it's okay, we all miss our families sometimes. But after a while the house and the people inside it become home, and family. It's just been over a month, the exciting part is over and now it's just everyday life, so yeah its kinda crap but it'll get better and easier, you'll see"