Nightmares and Fantasies | L.H | supernatural au

Ch. 2

I wake up once again, but not to forget a terrible memory, but to go to school, where I forget my worries for a while.

I dreamt of darkness, and nothing else when I fell back to sleep. Darkness is where I feel safe; in the light, I feel everyone can see right through me; being exposed to someone easily is one of my fears. In darkness I can hide, and no one will ever find out my secrets. That's my weakness.

I get in the shower and wash away the sleepiness in my eyes. I prepare myself to act normal for the day. Once I get out I take a long look at myself in the mirror. My eyes are sunken in, black holes I see them as, shoulders sloughed, and realise my back aches from standing in such a way. I stand straight and I hear my bones stretching out. I look like I got no sleep, well, I didn't. I get dressed quickly and rush downstairs to get some food. No one's here, it only happens rarely that my parents leave late for work.

I eat some cereal quickly and drink some water. Wake up Luke, wake up, I tell myself. If I could, I would go back upstairs and go to sleep to dream of darkness.

I go outside to walk to the bus stop. There are a few other kids here, but I don't talk to them. Most of my friends live out of my neighbourhood, but my closest are Calum, Michael, and Ashton. We have a band, 5 Seconds Of Summer, but I'm very modest about it. We practice at Michael's house sometimes, or in Ashton's garage, I think they do that to annoy their mothers. The rest of us think it's funny. When I'm with them or anyone of my friends, I forget my nightmares.

***

I walk into the school and to my locker. I often think of my last day of break when I take things out of book-bag. I take out a token that was at the carnival. I try to think of my fantasy, her. Calum has told me that she goes to Norwest Christian College and is in year 11, but it's Calum, so I don't believe it. I missed my chance that night, forever, and that was it.

I flick the token in my locker and close it then go to homeroom. I see Calum and sit by him.

"Hey Luke." He says with his voice beaming, it's much too loud for me.

I put my head down and try to get in a few extra minutes of sleep. Calum pats my back and doesn't even bother to tell me to get up. He knows the nightmares keep me up at night. But I don't have nightmares, I don't have nightmares, I don't have nightmares. I repeat this over and over again in my head. They'll go away if I believe they will.

"Hey Calum..." I slur after minutes of silence.

He lets out a laugh that brings a smile to my face.

"Took ya a while, are you dreaming about her? I'm telling you, she goes here! After homeroom I'll take you to where I see her every morning." He says.

I try to hide my smile, but I don't do too well because Calum starts poking my cheeks and tells me I'm blushing.

"I wasn't dreaming about her, I was thinking." I say, and that isn't a lie.

I start to wonder, will she look the same? Will she still have that same smile I saw on that memorising night? December 28th, time has passed since then, so much time that it's January 10th. I would always think, "What if I called after her a little louder?" Would she notice me then? But if she did, would she even want to talk to me?

The first bell rings and I pick up my binder. I follow Calum and try not to lose him in the crowd of kids hastily walking through the halls. We walk into an empty narrow hall, and soon we're at our History room, which I don't have until third period. Calum nudges me and I turn around.

"There, near Tracy. That's her." He whispers.

I look at her and try to stare long enough until she stares back. It might seem creepy, but to think I thought I lost my chance at the carnival, when I was losing my chance every morning. I start to slowly walk towards her but Calum pulls me back.

"What was that about?" I ask a little too loudly.

Calum doesn't answer and I don't look at him as I lock eyes with her. We stare at each other for a while, memorising one another. How do I look when she looks into my eyes? How does she see me? Her eyes are the same stormy grey they were that night at the carnival. Her brown hair quite the same but streaks of dirty blonde. I love it. We finally look away from each other and it feels strange not looking into her eyes. I awkwardly put my head down and Calum bursts out in laughter as she leaves.

"Wa-wait-what?" I say confused.

Calum slaps me on the back which causes me to stumble forward.

"You looked at her like a lost puppy!" He says between a laugh.

I don't get what was so hilarious. I shake my head and leave Calum to laugh his head off. I walk to my Pre-Calc class and take a seat. I take a quick look around; I really wish she was in my class. I don't even know her name, but once I see those eyes, I know it's her.

I tap my pencil against my desk as I stare at the blackboard. The teacher, Mr. Tenet, starts to write down our lesson today; I look down to copy what's on the board into my notebook but I broke my pencil. Yet again, too lost in thought. I toss it into the trash and sit back down.

"Here's another pencil Luke..." my friend Chloe says.

I take it and she smiles at me. I try to return the favour but it turns into a frown. I look away and smooth back my hair. Something's still bothering me.

"I'm sorry Chloe, it's just..." I can't get the words out, and she places her hand on my arm.

"It's alright Luke, whatever wrongs, I won't take it personally." She says.

I smile finally, usually everyone takes it personal. They think my frowns or shyness, or my distant, is because of them when in reality it's nothing about them, it's all about my mind.

"Thanks Chloe..." I say softly.

I turn away and Mr. Tenet starts class. I just need a breather, that's all. I have to stop lying to myself, I know that today, my nightmares have been bothering me more. They usually go away by now, but they still have a tug on me. I stare hard at my paper, a distraction. I close my eyes trying to forget everything, forgetting doesn't make it better, but it makes it easier, for now.